risk// 5SOS

38

Tw. Psych ward, abuse
Sage

I woke up startled, landing in a heap on the floor because I forgot I was no longer in a double bed.

Groaning, I stood and turned the lamp on, rubbing my eyes. I had a dull pain in my abdomen, so pulled my duvet back to climb into bed, only to see I had leaked on the sheets.

"Fuck off," I whined, "Why did you have to come now? I've not had you in months,"

Obviously, I had to get some new underwear and find some supplies, so I opened the door to my room and walked out into the hallway. The lights were extremely bright, so I shielded my eyes, and tried to remember my way to my own bedroom. The clock said 5am, but I felt like I hadn't slept.

It wasn't too far away, and as I approached my room, I was stopped by a male security guard.

"What's got you wandering round?"

"I need to get back to my room,"

"What's your name hun?"

"What's your name?"

I tried to get past them and they stood in my way, so I tried to nudge them, but he held my shoulder instead.

"Get off me!"

"I just wanna help you get back to your room, safely. You look tired,"

"This is my room,"

"You just came from the safe room, which means we need to escort you back and confirm with the nurses," he said, putting his hand on my back instead.

"Get off me!"

"Is everything okay?"

"Get off me,"

Another person came and held my other shoulder as I started to get agitated, and it felt too familiar. The monster who was my dad constantly haunted me, and I tried desperately to get their hands off me.

I watched as another stranger walked towards us, and another, and suddnely it felt like a whole crowd of people were around me, none of who I recognised. They probably thought I was dangerous, but they were actually triggering horrible memories for me, and I wanted to get away.

My heart beat was loud in my ears, and I looked around, everyone's faces turning into a blur. Men and woman, all tall, strong, and trying to hold my body.

At least, I felt like it. My rational voice wasn't loud enough to recognise, but I could count four people near me.

"Help!"

"What's your name sweetheart?"

"Help!"

"Hey, hey, we just wanna help you back to your room,"

"This is my room!"

"Darling, for your own safety we have to confirm this with a nurse back at the safe room,"

"I just need to get a tampon, please,"

"I thought you wanted to find your room?"

"And get a tampon," I shot.

"We're gonna walk back now, okay?"

"You're gonna do stuff to me, I know it. I know what this means,"

Throughout the chaos of it all, I heard footsteps, and someone whistling, whilst crinkling a bag of something. It got closer and closer, until it approached us, and stopped.

"We have a paranoid patient, unknown name. Can we have a psychiatrist down here please?"

"Paranoid? Nah, Sage isn't paranoid. We're room neighbours. They're new! And they are such a party pooper, they wouldn't play board games with me, and then we couldn't even talk tonight because they sleep in the safe room, because they can't sleep with people watching, because their dad used to be evil. And then,"