a shakespearen tragedy
(NO SMUT!!!) 💖
cowritten by myself and @mareeesaa
ideas for chapters contributed by
@Weird03413442
#2 in satire, 6/9/21 (nice)
#18 in rat, 12/6/20
#1 in ratatouille, 1/8/21
"THAT BASTARD," Tom muttered to himself, fists clenched and eyes bloodshot, "JERRY'S LEAVING ME FOR THAT STANK ASS RAT???? HOW COULD HE DO THIS TO ME???"
Tom grabbed his trusty pocket knife and marched over angrily to Jerry's door. There would be fire under his feet if he could afford such pyrotechnics, but alas, they would not sell to a cat, and he'd probably be homeless if he set the house on fire. But, he had metaphorical fire and that would have to be enough. Just imagine there could've been fire merely from his feet.
He knocked as hard as he could. No more fancy rhythms or knock knock jokes.
"JEROOOOME MOOOUUUSE!!!1!!" Tom spat with the rage of a sith lord. The last time he was this angry is when he was cursed to endlessly shit his pants from cat food that had milk in it, lactose intolerance, his beloathed, "YOU'VE BETRAYED ME FOR THE LAST TIME YOU CHEATING SCUM, YOU ABSOLUTE GERM ON THE TOILET, BIG ASS SATELLITE EARS LOOKING LOSER JOJDOAJALJSABFHOWJFJS!!!!"
Jerry didn't even dare to look out of the peephole, smart move.
"What are you talking about, and why do you know my full name?"
"UMMMM, WE WERE TOGETHER???? FOR YEARS??? HOW WOULD YOU FORGET SUCH A THING!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE I EVER TRUSTED YOU!!!" Tom's eyes transitioned from bloodshot to full-on yellow and red sith eyes.
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"IT'S OVER JERRY, I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND, AND I KNOW THAT YOU LEFT ME FOR REMY!!"
"I'M NOT EVEN WITH HIM, AND I ALREADY DUMPED YOU LONG BEFORE REMY CAME ALONG!" Jerry's voice now matched the volume of Tom's.
"I SEE THROUGH THE LIES OF THE JED- i mean uhhh YOUR MOUTH," Tom at this point was yelling with pure rage. His grip on his knife only grew stronger. "DON'T MAKE ME KILL YOU, I KNOW WHERE YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO BE. I'VE KILLED MANY RATS IN MY LIFETIME, I WON'T HESITATE TO DO IT AGAIN."
-JERRY'S POV-
What the fuck is this guy even talking about?? I don't even know whether to take him seriously or not...
"IF YOU'RE GONNA KILL HIM YOU'LL HAVE TO GET THROUGH ME FIRST!" WHat in the anime protagonist weeb shit am I doing??? Jerry thought, panicking.
"AHA! SEE, YOU ARE TOGETHER!!! NO ONE WOULD RISK IT ALL JUST FOR SOME GUY!!! YOU ADMIT TO CHEATING THEN!"
One of the homeowners walked by to see their cat hissing and meowing at the wall.
"Silly cat, there he goes again."
Alright, back to the arguing.
"I TOLD YOU WE AREN'T TOGETHER ANYMORE! HOW CAN I CHEAT ON SOMEONE I'M NOT EVEN WITH ANYMORE?? ARE YOU HEARING ANYTHING I'M SAYING?"
"No I'm deaf, OF COURSE I'M HEARING YOU!! YOU'RE JUST MAKING EXCUSES TO HIDE YOUR DESPICABLE BEHAVIOR" Tom hissed, emphasizing the 'despicable'.
"DESPICABLE??? LOOK IN THE MIRROR FIRST!! YOU'RE LITERALLY PLOTTING TO KILL ME??"
Tom giggled like a yandere and leaned in closer to the door.
"I know where you guys are going," he said in a sudden calm voice, "just know that I will also be there in 3 days, heehehehehheeheehhehehe~"
Shit, he knows. How am I supposed to confess without Tom interfering? Will Remy be ok? I will do what I must if it means saving him from potential death.
Jerry heard footsteps getting quieter and quieter. Tom left. Jerry's heart was racing and he was sweating bullets. He has to warn Remy about Tom.
