[[[忘羡 | WangXian 1]] : The Second Kiss That Came Too Soon

[22.] Jiang Yanli.

***

A month passed.

Jiang Yanli was watching her brother sit on the edge of the pier, his feet soaking into the salty water of the lake, his gaze lost somewhere beyond the horizon. She was contemplating going up to him and trying to cheer him up, or maybe bringing him something to eat  –  but neither of these had been working with him lately. He would fake a smile, politely decline, and sink into his own world, to a place she could not reach him.

Ever since her brothers came back from that accursed hunting campaign, A-Xian was different, changed. They used to be close, very close, sharing thoughts and emotions, stories, even as young children, but once her brother was back from that last night hunt, she saw the future adult in him. He had grown up, for just a couple of days. 

She didn't know what had happened during those three days, but it was something big and important in Wei Wuxian's life. Nowadays, he would prefer being alone; he would rarely joke, and he'd do whatever tasks were given him absolutely out of habit. She knew he wasn't sleeping much, and he barely ate.

Jiang Yanli tried to talk to Jiang Cheng about it – she dared not share something like that with her parents – but her younger brother just dismissed it all with a mocking wave of the hand:

- That fool is probably just in love! It'll pass, as usual!

And then Jiang Yanli remembered her heart-to-heart with Wei Ying, before the hunt. Could it be that he found that girl? Maybe she rejected him?

- A-Xian? Baby brother, you have been so sad lately...What's the matter?  –  she put her hands gently on his shoulders and bent down to kiss the top of his head.

Wei Ying turned his face up and it momentarily lit up, seeing his Shijie.

- Shijie!  I was just lost in thought! Who told you I was sad?? No such thing!  –  Wei Wuxian grinned.

She sat down next to him, and took his hand in hers.

- Wei Ying, we both know this is not true. Do you want to talk about it?

He hesitated – she could see it. But then he just shook his head, and his eyes drifted off again, to some place far away. Her heart was hurting; she knew something was wrong – but had no idea how to talk to him about it.

Wei Ying was so tempted! So tempted to tell everything to the person he felt closest to his heart in the whole world. How he had his doubts, how he hesitated to open his heart and his mind... how he was showered with pure love and pure joy by someone he doubted had any human feelings...the surprise, the shock of it. His own beautiful love confession... The way his mind was re-playing it all, over and over, and he was falling in love, deeper and deeper... 

He now felt in his own heart the desperation that had forced Lan Wangji to kiss him that day in the forest. 

He knew exactly how he felt, as if it had been him, as if the roles had been reversed, as if they were the same person.... 

A mirror image, a reflection in the water, one soul.