Painting Annalise

35 - Brayden

I've decided to leave this line for comments on the motivational pictures <3

"Annalise OD'd," Aaron says in between sniffs, and I feel time pause. My heart pounds loud enough that it's all I hear for a while. It's just like in the movies, my vision blurs and those two words are repeated over and over in my mind

"hey Brayden someone's still talking on the phone," Chris hits my back lightly. I look around the table to find them all staring at me. I feel the words stuck in my throat, as I try to process what's going on. I want to say it, to tell someone that the one person who has made me happy lately is in trouble. To say this is a joke she's pulling to see how much I like her. My phone drops from my hand.

Annalise.

"Hey man," Chris shakes my shoulders a bit gaining the attention of those around us. Ava slaps me hard enough for me to acknowledge the gravity of the situation. I push her away gently and grab my phone. Aaron has already sent the address. I'm walking slowly thinking of everything, her tiny smiles, her glare, the way her eyes brightened whenever she liked something. I sprint to my car placing the address as fast as I can. 

My mind is all over the place as I hear her laughter that she never let people hear. Tears form in my eyes making it hard for me to focus on the road.

She is the most amazing person I have ever met in my whole nineteen years of existence. I remember the first time I looked at her in AP calculus, that idiot Casper had his arm around her when she clearly looked uncomfortable. I don't know if it's called love at first sight but my heart raced as she sat next to me. I had to talk to her, I didn't care if it was in a rude way I just had to.

Lunch came and her friends told my brothers and I all about her, making me more intrigued. They seemed to all love her and when she sat at the table it bothered me when she didn't say anything.

From the rumors I heard during my first week, I expected her to be a bitch. She was quite the opposite. Annalise barely spoke and when she did it was clear she was barely living.

I remember when I caught her about to jump off the roof, I panicked but decided to approach her calmly. I learned how she didn't talk much. Then she started opening up and I fucked it all up by kissing Ava. I wish I knew what caused me not to say pass. It wasn't until she told me sorry that I realized how much I had fucked up.

After my birthday, she barely spoke to me, let alone glance my way. Ava was always around me because she was new and was finding it difficult to make friends. We're childhood friends and I see her as nothing more than a sister. I didn't know she was the reason Annalise avoided me till Aaron approached me.

I made up my mind to speak to her the next day but she never came to school. I went to her house but Aaron told me she wasn't in and so I waited for the next day.

The next day is today.

I park the car and hurriedly enter the hospital. It's the exact same one my granddad was in about a month ago when he rang his bell for his last chemotherapy session. The smell of antiseptic and bleach hits my nose as I bolt to the front desk.

"Annalise Zion," I say to the nurse, she checks her system before looking at me.

"family only," she says professionally.

"I'm her... fiancé," I think of the best lie to help me see her. The lady's smile grows as she stares at me.

"oh, young love" she smiles before giving me the necessary details.

When the elevator door opens I rush to the room number I was given and collect my thoughts before knocking on the door.

Aaron's sitting with his head buried between his legs, he rocks back and forth repeating something inaudible and I just know this is a scene I'll never forget for the rest of my life. The moment he looks up I'm met with bloodshot eyes. The sight of Annalise in the hospital gown, with different IV bags connected to her and pale lips, is all it takes for the tears to fall.

"I fucked up" he repeats to himself "I fucked up"

I shake my head before sliding down the wall to sit next to him "it's not your fault Aaron"

"It feels like it," his hoarse voice making it hard to hear exactly what he's saying. The Aaron on the floor next to me is far different from the playboy and party animal everyone sees. Right now every facade and fake desire is replaced with the guilt of an older brother whose younger sister is hanging on a thin thread. It makes me remember the first time I saw him, how his fists repeatedly delivered every necessary message to Casper's face. However, from our roof conversations, I could tell Annalise always believed he hated her.

"she would never want you looking like this," I try to advise us both

He doesn't say anything as we both stare at her body.

"the doctor says she's out of danger but she slipped into a coma" he explains to me.

"she'll be out soon," I say trying to reassure myself as well as Aaron

"I hope so too," he replies calmly

.....

Annalise isn't awake but her mum is back. The poor woman couldn't stand the sight of me because I apparently caused her daughter to relapse and I don't blame her. Sam hated me until she saw me sitting in front of the room for the third day in a row.

That day she broke into full sobs about how she failed her husband. That's when I realized Annalise's dad was dead. She forced Aaron and I to go to school to write our exams. When I asked about Annalise, the principal said she had enough grades to pass the session but if she came out of the coma she was always welcome to take the test.

Aaron was struggling but I saw him become a better person over the past two weeks. We had become so close I barely hung out with anyone else but him. The others didn't know about Annalise's situation. Aaron had lied to them she went to visit her aunt on the other side of town. When we spoke later, he told me it was for the main time till she woke up.

I asked him why he called me and his exact words were "I don't know if you cast a spell on my sister but she's doing so much better with you."

Today is Sunday, I usually go to church but Sam said I can stay with Annalise while she and Aaron went to pray.

I was going to wait a bit to let the weight of Annalise's situation dawn on everyone but I think the period of silence is ok now.