Mj
March 30
12:20 pm
"My momma didn't want a funeral so that's why we ain't have one" serenity told me as I did some tribal braids on her hair for her 14th birthday tomorrow
"Oh okay. So you good though?"
"I think so. I don't know"
"Well you gone feel like that cause it's still new but I wantchu to do two things for me. The first one is never let nobody discredit how you should feel. If you feeling sad, angry, or whatever don't let them tell you you're doing too much or that you're not doing enough. The second thing is promise you'll talk to somebody Grieving is not a short term thing and it's not a continuous thing. You might feel okay one minute and the next you might wanna scream or cry and that's okay"
"That's what Kay's sister Yasmine told me. She gave me her number and told me i could talk to her anytime cause she know how it feels to hold it in"
"She don't talk to nobody?"
Serenity shook her head "she said she don't wanna bother Kay and they other sister with her problems cause they got lives and her daddy don't ever wanna listen to her"
"That's not good at all"
It got quiet as I continued her hair
"You know Ms Dena said I could still live with her"
"Why you sound surprised? You thought she was gone make you leave or something?"
She shrugged "I don't know. The only family I got now is benji and he already got a lot of kids to deal with so I though I was gonna be sent away"
"Girl no. I could've told you that wasn't gonna happen. And besides you got Nunu too right?"
"That's benji cousin on his daddy side. I talk to her a couple of times but I never really was around her that much cause my momma ain like benji's daddy family"
"I thought y'all had the same daddy"
"No. Our older brothers got the same daddy then it's benji and then me" she explained and I looked at her confused
"Y'all got other brothers?"
She nodded "one dead and one in jail"
[before y'all start look at the picture at the bottom! It was mentioned before but it was all the way in book 1 so I know y'all won't remember if you read the book when it first came out lol]
"What the fuck. I never knew that"
"I don't really know em. My momma would write the one in jail but he would never call or write back for some reason and benji don't like to talk about neither of them"
"Oh shit. I never knew that. I thought it was just y'all two"
"Well it is.. it's just us two now"
She unlocked her phone and went to Snapchat and as she did so I realized this girl had a 12
"You got the iPhone 12?"
"Yeah. My other phone got messed up in the accident so Kay and benji got me this one yesterday"
She started sliding over her messages but didn't open them completely while sighing
"Everybody keep sending me these sad messages since last week and I'm just now seeing them" she told me before going to her memories and clicked on the most recently saved video which was of her and her mom in the car singing Cupid by 112
"I took this video right before we got in the accident and I don't know why but I keep looking at it over and over again."
"If it makes you feel better then keep looking at it as much as you want"
