Nobody Else

Chapter Twenty Nine

I was wrong. Being in the UK didn't make me feel any safer. I couldn't relax. I barely slept and when I did, I would have nightmares. I didn't even feel safe when I was with the boys. I would spend hours staring out the window, as the flashbacks overwhelmed me. I was disappointed in myself, I wanted to be strong and move on with my life, but I couldn't. I knew that Sophie was worried about me, I could tell by her body language.

I sighed and switched on the stereo in a desperate attempt to distract myself. I needed to get lost in the music.

Jay's POV

I sighed as I quickly hung up the phone. I was really worried about Anna. I knew that she wasn't coping with things, she tried to hide it, but I could see through her. I needed to fix her. She needed me, I had to be strong for her. She wasn't doing very well at the moment, let alone when she found out. I was a little concerned about how she would react. I sighed and made my way downstairs.

Anna's POV

I looked up and saw Jay standing in the doorway, hovering nervously. I smiled at him as he walked over and sat next me.

"How are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm fine, you know I'm a tough cookie." I said.

He looked at me and raised his eyebrow.

"Don't." he whispered.

"Don't what?" I asked him.

"Don't pretend, I know you too well." he answered.

"I don't want to talk about it." I said quickly as I felt tears prick my eyes.

"Maybe it will help, you still haven't told me what actually happened." he stated.

"Nothing happened." I said truthfully.

"Well who hit you then?" he asked as he brushed my black eye with his thumb.

"I don't know, it happened when I tried to escape." I whispered.

I watched as he placed his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close. I rested my head against his chest and sighed in contentment.

"You went through a terrible ordeal, I should have looked after you better." he said, sighing deeply.

"Don't think like that, I'm not your responsibility." I told him sternly.

"Yeah you are." he insisted.

"It's okay to be afraid, you don't have to pretend all the time." he added.

As soon as he said those words I burst out crying. I was touched that he still cared for me, it reminded me of how things used to be. How we used to take care of each other. He'd broken down my defences, all the feelings I'd been having for the last few weeks came flooding out and I began to sob.

"Let it all out baby." he whispered as he kissed the top of my head.

We sat for a while, me sobbing whilst he held me tightly. He didn't say anything, he seemed to know that I needed to get it out of my system. Eventually I stopped crying, I didn't have the energy left.

"I need to tell you something." he said cautiously.

I removed myself from his arms and looked at him, slightly nervous about what he was going to say.

"I got a phone call from Jayne, and she has booked some more dates for us to perform." he said quietly.

"In the UK?" I asked.

"Yeah but..." he started and then stopped.

"What?" I asked.

He looked away from me and stared at the floor.

"We'll be on the road for a couple of weeks and no girls are allowed." he whispered. I could tell that he felt guilty.

"Why?" I whispered.

"She wants us to bond as a group and not be distracted by you guys." he replied rolling his eyes.

I scoffed and looked at him.

"When do you leave?" I asked quietly.

"Later today." he stated.

"Wow." I breathed as my heart sunk.

Now I wouldn't even have the boys around. I hated the fact that I would be so far away from him.

"I'm sorry." he whispered.

"I can stay with you." he suggested when I didn't respond.

"No you have to make the most of this, I'll be fine." I said quietly.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"Yep, I'll try and get another placement so that I can finish my course." I told him.

"Good idea." he smiled.

An hour or so later, I stood in the lounge and watched as Nathan walked away from me. It had been hard to say goodbye to him, even though I knew that I would see him again soon. Jay stood next to me as he waited for us to be alone. Eventually Tom, Siva and Max left and got into the taxi.

"Bye then." he said uncomfortably.

He smiled down at me and pulled me gently into his arms.

"I wish you didn't have to go." I whispered.
"I know, but I'll be back soon, I promise." he said quietly.

He pulled away almost reluctantly and looked into my eyes. I looked back and got lost in them once again. I blinked in surprise as he bent down and kissed me. I quickly recovered from the shock and kissed him back. It was gentle and tender. He gently pulled away and I kept my eyes shut trying to savour the moment.

"What was that for?" I managed to say eventually.

"I'm not really sure." he frowned.

I watched him nervously, not really sure what to say.

"We'll talk when I get back." he whispered as he quickly kissed my cheek and walked away.