Let Me Be The One

Chapter 20: Don't touch me

Chapter 20: Don't touch me

Berry's POV

It's been a week since Jake and I broke up. A melancholy week for me. A week without Jake broke me into pieces.

How could he say that I don't love him the way he loves me? He even included Maf!

I know that it was a wrong choice to take Maf home. But then again if you were in my position, I know you'd do the same.

Maybe Jake was just scared. Scared that he'll lose his job, knowing that someone knew about our taboo relationship. Maybe he isn't ready yet. I guess it was just too early than what we expected.

But still I know that I love him no less. I'm just waiting for him to get back with me.

"Berry, can I talk to you?" Jake asked. Oh, now he's talking to me. But his tone is very serious.

I didn't say anything but followed him. We went somewhere private, where students don't go.

"Berry..." he started with a soft voice. But it was so quite that I heard him. I just looked at him, not knowing what to say.

"Berry, I think we should separate ways now. It's better for us to have a normal student-teacher relationship," he said.

"But I thought we would think this one out. Maybe you're just over thinking! Please don't resort into this! Please Jake, I can't do this," I pleaded him.

"No. My decision is final. I don't love you anymore," he admitted. No! He can't just unlove me that fast!

"Berry!" why is he calling me? I haven't ran away. I'm still not crying!

"Berry....." he calls out again. Whyyyy----

"Wake up. Kanina ka pa tulog! 3 subjects na," sabi ni May. (sorry if I had to type in tagalog agad agad bc hindi naman englishera si May. Di na siya incharacter non. So mianhae!)

"Huh? So it was just a dream?" I asked.

"Ano ba napanaginipan mo?" tanong niya. Nakataas pa ang kilay. Aba

"I can't remember eh. But the feeling is so surreal. Nagkecave in nga yung strong feelings. Parang may hole sa heart ko sa sobrang sakit. I just don't remeber why but it hurts," sabi ko with hawak sa puso bc it still hurts eh.

"Siguro about kay Jake yan? Siya lang naman kasi makakapaglabas ng big emotions sa iyo eh. Di ba?" sabi niya na parang di siya sure. Why?

"Oo naman. Siguro siya nga. I mean, it's been what? 3 weeks since we talked personally? I don't think I can handle a week more," I admitted.

'I don't love you anymore'

Biglang nagecho sa isipan ko yan. I don't know where I'd heard that but it directly brought pain to my heart.

Maybe sa isang movie lang, or I had encounter a major break up---

It was my dream. It's not just that I encountered a break up. I had seen my major break up!

Thinking about it, even though it's not real, I can't help but feel sad and devastated. As I'd said earlier, I can't keep up for another week without him.

"Wag mo na masyadong isipin yan. Malay mo, later lapitan ka ni SirPogi para makipag ayos. And you'll live happily ever after!" sabi niya na nagtatry to lighten up the mood. Well, sana nga makipag ayos na siya. Pero! Pero hindi siya makikipagbreak.

Sometimes, nakikipag ayos sila para magkaroon ng peace break. You know, where in the both of them agreed that it's better to just separate ways because everything is alright between the two of them. That they'll still have the friendship they had before all of that.

I've been getting so little sleep this past few weeks. I've been up all night thinking how to get him back. It's just that it looks like he doesn't want back.

Everyday, I approach him and try to get back. I was desparate, I know. But I just love him so much, I don't care what I have to do to just have him back.

It's either he ignores me or dismiss me bluntly.

There's one time that.....

"Jake, please talk to me. I don't know what to do anymore," I desperately told him. I want him back!

I received no response from him but I continued.

"I know you still love me. We don't have to punish ourselves anymore. I know, too, that I love you, no less and I think, more than you do."

"Berry, not now," he told me without looking at me. He's massaging his temples like he's in pain.

I went to reach out but he pushed away my hand.

"Don't touch me," he spat.

I was hurt and rejected. Now, he doesn't want me to touch him. Maybe even feeling me beside him angers him. Is this how bad the effect of what I did?

He looked startled with what he did but moments later he changed back to the emotionless face.

"Please leave, I have too many things to do," he dismissively said.

I was tempted to say something but he was somewhat glaring at me. I was afraid. Then I went out and cry.

I think that triggered the dream I just had. No wonder it caused too much pain.

"Berry, uwi na tayo..." alangang sabi ni May. Uwian na pala! I didn't notice.

"Alam mo, buong araw kang tulala. Nagwoworry na ang iba nating classmates sama mo na din ang teachers natin. Please, bring back my Berry," sabi niya.

"I can't. Only Jake can bring back the old Berry," I sadly admitted.

"Berry naman, paano ka babalikan ni Sir nyan kung ganyan ka? Maybe out of guilt kaya makikipagbalikan siya sayo. Gusto mo ba yun?" pangaral niya.

"No of course not. I know that he loves me kaya he'll get back with me," I told her, maybe even convincing myself that I'm right.

I trust Jake more than anyone in this world. I know we would get back together.