I'm sorry for the errors sa previous chapters. Arra call her parents Mama and Papa, pala. I was working to my BL story that day so medyo naguluhan ako. Sorry for that.[Kabanata 24]
I CAN'T believe that they wanted to save me from my family. And I can't believe that they suffered a lot too. I was busy thinking about myself, not knowing what they were dealing with.
I'm a bit insensitive in that part that I triggered their traumas. I felt sorry for that.
“Arra,” Kian called me when we passed by on my sisters bedrooms. They were all asleep.
I don't know what did these two guys done with my sisters. But I don't care for them right now. I was busy thinking about the problems of these two guys were dealing with.
I can't believe that also, they have their own traumas. I thought, behind those words they told me just came from their heart. But I didn't know, it was all based on their own experiences.
I looked at Kian, he smiled a bit. But I know, he was just pretending that he was alright.
I can't tell why people chose to pretend than show their real feelings and expression towards others.
That's why people think that they were okay, so they won't bother asking them if they were okay.
But I can suggest that, we can help people everyday without minding what are they dealing with. With asking them if they are okay and give some motivational quotes. It will be effective.
It's not okay to be okay, and it's okay not to be okay.
It's not okay that you will pretend that you're okay even though you were shattering into pieces, thinking why you were born if you would suffer such pains. It's okay not to be okay, 'cause all of us felt of giving up. We were all tired, we have our own demons to deal with, but we must know that we need to fight in order to see rainbows after surpassing all of the obstacles and mountains. After reaching it's peak, there are better things for you.
So, learn to fight. If you're tired then take a rest but never give up.
“Sasama ka ba sa 'kin?" He asked, or more like nangungumbinsi na sa kan'ya sumama.
My forehead creased about that. What does he mean? I mean, sa kan'ya?
“Huh?” I uttered confusedly. He looked at Kaleb who was silent the whole time.
“You need to choose kung kanino ka sasama.” Kaleb, was a bit cold. Naninibago ako sa kan'ya. Why was he acting like that?
“It's okay if it's not me.” Pagsusuko ni Kian sa kan'yang bandera, like he surrendered immediately.
How can he give up easily?
“I'm not choosing yet,” I uttered.
Napatingin sa 'kin si Kaleb, ngunit agad din itong umiwas ng tingin. Was he expecting something, huh?
“But I know sino ang pipiliin mo,” agap nito sa 'kin. “How are you sure?”
“It's obvious that you'll choose Kaleb over me Arra. I'm not that oblivious to not know.” I saw his pained expression but he immediately changed it.
“Still, I'm not choosing yet,” pinal kong sabi, bahagya siyang nagulat sa sinabi ko.
Still, tahimik pa rin si Kaleb. If I know, he was thinking about the words he trown in me. He knew that I was hurt. He knew that it broke my heart.
“Kaleb...” Marahan kong tawag sa kan'ya, nagkatitigan kami at siya naman ang umiwas.
“I'm choosing Kian,” walang pag-aalinlangang ani ko.
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BINABASA MO ANG
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