The Truth Is... [Brallon]

ALONE

BRENDON'S POV:

Everything was not okay. It was nearly midnight and I was still sober. I meant to be that way just in case Tyler and Chris got too smashed and they needed my help. They had tons of friends around them, but they were just as smashed. I let out a sigh when I saw all the couples having fun, hanging all over each other. I have more important things to worry about other than finding someone that wants to shove their tongue down my throat.

I began to feel alone again, even though I knew I wasn't. It wasn't a feeling I liked, but it wasn't something that would trigger another attempt. I knew some people cared for me now and that made a big difference in my thought process.

The medication also helped. Another reason I decided to skip the alcohol. Something about too much alcohol could fuck up my medication or something. I also have a puppy named Bogart, but he was a gift meant for someone else that I care about dearly. She isn't here tonight and I miss her. I haven't been away from her for very long in the last year, she has become a lifeline to me.

I take one last glance at Ty and Chris before heading outside for a smoke. They seemed to be doing okay on the sofa, drunkenly chatting with their friends. I kinda needed to get away from all the explicit PDA.

I plopped down on the back deck with a heavy sigh. I don't regret leaving Dallon the way I did. He didn't deserve me if he cheated. I just feel a little lonely since we've been apart. I doubt he would even want to hear from me again, let alone see me. I honestly didn't want to see him either for the simple fact that I don't think I could ever forgive him for the infidelity. I just don't see where I went wrong. We were great as friends, and the first year of our actual relationship until everything slowly deteriorated.

My lonely thoughts were broken by a fight breaking loose in the backyard by the pool. It sounded pretty heated and hands-on. I didn't hear any yelling, not really. It was just mostly skin to skin. I couldn't see anything since there was a privacy fence around the pool and I kept it that way just in case it wasn't a fight after all... The thought made me want to gag on the smoke from my cigarette.

I don't mind sex. I love it. It's just the thought they would be so stupid to do it publicly. Especially when the party was full of celebrities.

At least they have a little privacy I guess.

It went on for a good ten minutes before someone moans. For fuck's sake... I hate it when I'm right. I was nearly done with my cigarette, stomping it into the earth below my feet when the door opened.

My stomach dropped. I felt sick and I don't know what the sight should make me feel that way. I was over him. No, I wasn't. I don't think I'd truly be able to get over him despite the things he put me through. I know they both saw me but I didn't stick around to catch up. I ran through the house, attempting to run to the bathroom that was attached to my room. Someone was in there. Of course, they were. A couple was making out on my bed practically to the point of fucking. I wouldn't be surprised if another couple was doing the same in my bathroom. I just wanted my meds.

I couldn't get them so my only option was to leave before my anxiety attack became a panic attack.

I grabbed my keys and phone, not bothering to tell anyone where I was going because I didn't even know that information. I thought about finding someone to 'spend the night with' But, one-night stands weren't my thing anymore.