Bedburg Hills

45

JUSTIN POV

I headed out to the woods, as soon as I couldn't see the house I started to shift. I started to walk around, taking everything in around me. I'd listen to the squirrels than ran through the trees, the bugs that crawled through the leaves. I could hear the breathing of everything around me. I continued to walk on, exploring the parts I haven't been to yet.

I stopped and sat down, I started to think to myself. I allowed myself to shift back to a human and I climbed up into a tree, fixing myself on a branch and leaning against the trunk.

"Oh man," I let out a sigh, "how do I control things? Why can't I control myself? I wish you were here, dad. I could use your advice and guidance right about now."  The wind blew exceptionally hard and I started to chuckle, "yeah yeah, you know I never really believed in all that stuff but hell, maybe I will if you can give me some sort of a sign. Anything. I'll treat the next coincidental or negative thing, whichever comes first, probably negative thing but anyways, I'll treat it as a sign. As a pointer, as a navigator I guess. I don't know a lot as happened and I don't know if you are up there and you are looking down on me, but if you aren't, just be happy you aren't. I've made so many mistakes, I haven't been able to be strong enough even I need to be, I haven't been an alpha dad. How am I supposed to live up to that role? To you?" I could feel the tears in my eyes. I scoffed and threw my hand in the air, "look. Crying. Again. What is that? Weak. It's weak. I'm sorry I keep letting you down. I'm trying my best not to. There isn't a damn day that goes by that I don't think about you atleast a hundred times. You shouldn't be gone. None of you should be gone." I turned around quickly as I heard footsteps approaching quickly. I felt the hands of another wrap around my neck and the two of us plummeted to the ground. 

The wind was knocked out of me once I hit the grass, "what the hell?" I stood up as quickly as I could. A vampire stood in front of me, her fangs were out, she was hissing. "You want to fight?" I laughed, "well bring it then." I felt my eyes glow and I started to shift. I growled and the two of us charged at each other, suddenly it dawned on me. 

She was to most beautiful creature I've ever seen. I can't hurt her. I stopped immediately and shift back to a human, dodging her attack, "wait wait wait! I don't want to hurt you." She stopped and looked at me confused. 

"Why not?" she asked, "I attacked you, granted you are on my land." I looked around me.

"I'm sorry," I shook my head, "I'm from over that way, I came out here to get some fresh air and I guess I just wandered too far." 

"What do you mean fresh air?" she questioned more, "you're a wolf, you could live outside." 

"I used to," I nodded, "that was before I moved here of course. I mean I came out to think about my problems, as dumb as that sounds. I'm just trying to sort things out. What's your name?" 

"Esme," she said sternly, "yours?" 

"Justin," I smiled, "it was uh- it was nice to meet you but I better get out of here." I turned around and started to leave. 

"Hey wai-" her voice became distant and it took everything I had not to stop and run back to her. I got back to the part of the woods I recognized and then shifted back to my human state. 

"Well," I sighed, "there's my lesson and how does this happen? What was that feeling? I- what do I do?" I sat down and leaned my head against the tree, looking up at sky. The leaves were starting to change colors on all the trees, I could smell the rain that was making it's way towards town. 

I took a deep breath and stood up, making my way back towards the house. I walked in the back door. "Hey man," Jace greeted me, "how'd it go?" 

"Uhh it went... good," I nodded, "it went okay. I'll probably go back out later for a few honestly." I headed upstairs before anything else could be said and hopped in the shower. 
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