Hellcat

Chapter 79

My first stop had to be the church. I had been gone all night, and Matt didn't know where I was. I had to check on him, make sure he didn't do anything stupid, or get hurt again. On top of that, I had to let Maggie know to expect Karen. She and Father Lantom had to know what was going on. At least part of it.

When I arrived at the church, I was greeted by the dark frown of Father Lantom. "Allison," he sighed, greeting me with what sounded like grief. "What's wrong?" I asked, knowing he wouldn't be looking at me like that if everything was okay. He sighed, shaking his head. "Matthew's not here. Hasn't been since last night," he mumbled in response. My eyebrows crinkled together in confusion.

"Okay... so where the hell is he?" I asked, not caring that I was in a church. It seemed that Lantom didn't care either. Usually he would give me a look of disappointment, but he just seemed sad now. "I don't know. None of us do." I scoffed, shaking my head as denial and confusion mixed with a sinking feeling in my gut.

"Why would he just take off?" I asked, hoping against hope that Matt had just left and chose somewhere else to hide out instead of left and ended up dead somewhere. "He overheard something he... he shouldn't have. Something that hurt him. And you know how he gets when he's hurt," Lantom sighed. His shoulders were slumped over, and his eyes seemed paler than normal. Had he slept at all last night?

Pushing my senses out, I tried to listen for any sign of Matt in the church. Maybe there was some way for me to find him. I started towards the side stairs down to the basement before I even heard the soft sniffling. If there was anything that Matt left behind, it would be there. But the sniffling almost made me stop in my tracks. Slowing, I moved down the stairs as I listened to a single heartbeat. Someone was down here crying. Why would they be crying? And why would anyone be crying if there was only one heartbeat?

Fear raced through me, pushing Father Lantom's assured words that Matt wasn't here out of my mind. But the priest was someone who thought of Heaven as a different place. If Matt wasn't here, he could be there. And if he was there, my whole world would implode once more.

Instead of the horrible sight I thought I would see, I was greeted with Sister Maggie sitting on the edge of the small, immaculately made bed. "Sister Maggie?" I called out tentatively. She sniffled, lifting her gaze to mine. She was the one who was crying. But why?

"What happened? W-where's Matt?" I asked her, the fear of uncertainty still pumping through me. "He's gone. I don't know where," she huffed out, wiping at her cheeks. "But he won't be back." The certainty with which she made that statement only made my chest ache more.

"I don't understand. Why not? He's been here for months. Why would he just up and leave?" I questioned. It was hard to keep my voice soft as I spoke. I wanted to know everything. I wanted to know where Matt was.

"He learned the truth," was her cryptic response. I was about to make a snappy comment about her being too vague when she spoke again. "I'm his mother." My jaw dropped at her statement. I could only stare at her in disbelief. Matt had never known his mother. As far as I knew, he'd never seen any pictures of her. Jack Murdock had never spoken of her, and I had even doubted that she was still alive. I wanted to say something to her. I wanted to ask a million questions. But I couldn't.

"Wow, uh..." was the only thing that I managed to get out. Even through the shock, there were a few thoughts that registered. Maggie had been here for Matt's whole childhood. The church was only nine blocks from where Matt and I grew up. She could have visited him. She could have been there for him – been a real mother. But she let him believe he didn't matter to him. She gave him up.

"Please, Allison, you have to understand, I was a danger to Matthew when I gave him up," she began to plead. I hadn't realized my expression had shifted from shock to disgust until she spoke. "Nowadays, they know a great deal about postpartum, but... at the time... I was convinced that I was betraying God." Her explanation made sense, sort of. But it still hurt. It was still something that caused me to feel pain for Matt.