train wreck ✓

fifty-one.

i shrugged, trying to let him down gently. i was trying to make it seem like he wasn't making me uncomfortable but he was, "not hungry," i muttered playing with my sleeve before looking down at how it didn't fit my body.

his fake smile toned down a bit, "a drink?"

and then i thought of miles, my eyes unconsciously looking into travis' blue eyes, wishing they were that warm yet dull color of brown that I'd come to love. he was tall as well, me looking up at him more than i'd have to look up at miles begin only four inches shorter. but travis was bordering on 6 ft with blond hair that seemed to be messed up from stress yet a smile that seemed carefree.

he wasn't miles.

miles liked me and i liked miles.

but miles left me.

"not interested."

i saw travis lean over, picking up an album i was stacking before reading the list of songs on the back. "you're hard to get, i like that."

i couldn't help the snide comment that slipped out of my mouth, "you're annoying, i don't like that."

"fiesty..."

he wouldn't leave and although he seemed nice enough, he was shady. he wasn't like miles who held the characteristics of patrick from The Perks of Being a Wallflower, ya know, without the gayness and a little more depressed. no travis, himself was like a Taylor Swift song, catchy as fuck, happy as fuck, yet utterly fucked up in a way in which you'd love to know the story behind it but you also know you can't subject yourself.

that's what inhibited me from letting him hit on me that day.

miles wasn't coming back, "i have a boyfriend," i lied.

"i wasn't asking you to marry me."