train wreck ✓

fifty-nine.

he asked me to listen to him.

but his lips were right there and the wind was blowing through his hair and he looked so beautiful.

but apparently, according to miles, making out wasn't in the deal while we agreed to talk about our issues. my hands were under his sleeveless beatles shirt that used to be my dad's. miles' back was pressed against the wall of the staircase that led down inside the building. my legs were wrapped around his waist, hands in his hair.

my eyes were screwed shut, lips molded to fit his as nerves buzzed through me and warmth fed my chilled bones. i felt his teeth nibbling on my lip as his hands drew circles on the bottoms of my thighs and just as our first real kiss, everything felt intensified.

and then my lips were on his neck, my fingers fell to the button on his jeans undoing it before my hands slid down further. i don't know why it happened, maybe nature taking his course or i felt so impossibly close to him. grabbing my hands, he set me down on my feet, "you don't want this."

and just like the first time he'd said that, i called complete and utter bullshit.

i squeezed my eyes shut, trying to keep myself from going off. he'd been rejecting all of my advances yet he'd sad he was ready and in love, "you're not ready."

"... georgie."

and although it felt like a low blow, i had to make it known, "you're still wrapped up in your ex-girlfriend."

he gave me a soft smile that didn't reach the sadness in his eyes, "it's not that... sex is a big deal-"

"and i know that! but i love you and i want to be that close to you!"

he tried to reach for my hand but i snatched it back, "i can't!"

i couldn't help but roll my eyes, "you're thinking about her aren't you? it's fucking unhealthy, to be honest; this pain is ruining you and-"

and that was when he sighed, resigning and sitting down on one of the rooftop chairs that we'd set up, he held his hand out to me. miles' hair was blowing through the wind and his tattoos looked even more meaningful, "can we at least talk about it first? it feels like you, you just... you don't get it."