contrarium | 𝘫𝘢𝘺𝘸𝘰𝘯

Chapter 31

The next day. Jungwon felt better and woke up early after sleeping almost the whole day yesterday. He tried to sit on his bed after his back getting sore from laying down. He stared at Jay who's still sleeping at the couch beside his bed.

He knows his boyfriend is already tired of staying with him in the hospital. They are supposed to be enjoying their break but here they are, stuck at the hospital.

"At least we are together..." Jungwon thought to himself. He then tried to go near the window to look at the scenery. His steps are small and slow because he's still weak but he's trying to conquer and be stronger each day.

Just a couple of minutes later, Jay woke up as well and was shocked to see Jungwon standing up from his bed.

"Hey, baby. Are you okay? Why are you out of your bed?" Jay rushed to Jungwon and gave him a back hug.

"It sucks laying down on top of that bed. I feel weaker when my skin touches an inch of it." Jungwon replied and just felt the warmth of Jay's wrapped hands around his waist. "Can't we go out? I don't want to be here." the younger complained.

"I also don't want you to stay here, Wonie. I hate being here not because I don't want to be with you but because I hate seeing you getting all the painful treatment. I want to go out too but I know you're better here. They can monitor your health better." Jay explained to his boyfriend.

"If I die suddenly, find a person who will make you happy." Jungwon uttered as he stared at the farthest tree outside through the clear window.

"What are you saying? You won't die." Jay shrugged off. "Besides, you are that person. You make me the happiest man alive, Wonie."

"Let's be realistic, Jay. I—"

"Here we go again. Can we stop talking about this?" Jay felt a little bit annoyed. He has always hated the thought of Jungwon dying. "You promised me we'll be together. Are you going to break that promise?" Jay asked and felt his tears are about to fall but he tried to stop himself from bursting out.

Jungwon became silent and went back to staring outside. Jay faced his boyfriend once again. "What's on your mind now?" he asked.

"I'm just thinking of my cactuses. I need love and affection now and they also need water and sunlight. What if they die?" Jungwon's thought may seem funny but it was a serious matter for him.

"We can buy at the plant store and just replace them—" Jay was stopped when Wonie started talking again.

"No plants will be the same like them. If they die, you won't find anything like them. If they die knowing I did not give them any of their needs, what would I feel?" Jungwon said which turned out to be weird to Jay.

The younger tried to point out the essence of death and love—how are these two connected. Jungwon worries a lot about his death. He's afraid he hasn't given Jay all the love he deserves.

"They are just plants. Let's not fight because of them, baby. We have to be happy all the time." The older rubbed both Jungwon's shoulders. "I know we won't find anything like them. Just like I won't find anyone like you. I love you so much, baby." Jay said and kissed his boyfriend's lips despite the paleness of these.

They were stopped when a knock from outside occurred and it was Jungwon's nurse checking up on him. "Hi there, I can see you're feeling better, Jungwon." she said and started what needs to be done.

"Your case is a rare one and to be honest with you, it's my first time encountering such. Most of our patients with brain cancer and brain tumor are easily treated and monitored well but in your case, we are having a hard time examining because the tumors seemed to be gone but they just started mutating." The nurse said while doing her routines with Jungwon.