Chapter 11 - when you grow up, your heart dies

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Your POV

"It's like me" Brian starts "with my grades, like, when I step outside myself and when I look at myself, I don't like what I see. I really don't"

"Why don't you like yourself?" Claire wonders.

"Because I'm stupid. I'm failing Shop. We had this assignment to make an ceramic elephant, and we had eight weeks to do it. And it was like a lamp, when you pull the trunk, the light was supposed to go on. And my light didn't go on... I got an F on it, I've never got an F in my life. When I signed up, for the course I mean, I thought I was playing real smart, you know. Because I thought; I'll take shop, it'll be such an easy way to maintain my grade point average..." Brian explains.

"Why did you think it would be easy?" I ask him.
"Have you seen some of the dopes that take Shop?" He tells me.
"I take shop" I spit back
"Yeah, me too" Bender says

"you must be a fucking idiot." Bender says.
"I'm a fucking idiot because I can't make a lamp?" Brian asks.
"No, you're a genius because you can't make a lamp..."

"What do you know about Trigonometry?" Brian asks Bender.
"I could care less about Trigonometry"
"Bender, did you know without Trigonometry there'd be no engineering?"
"Without lamps, there'd be no light!"
"Okay we get it! Neither of you is better than the other!" I interrupt them.

"I can write with my toes!" Allison suddenly joins in "I can also eat, brush my teeth.."
"With your feet?" Claire asks.
"...play Heart and Souls on the piano"

"I can make spaghetti!" Brian says.

"Andrew what can you do?" I ask.
"I can tape all your buns together!"

"What can you do y/n?" Bender asks me.
"I can play the guitar, I guess.."
"Awesome"

"I wanna see what Claire can do" Bender says.
"I can't do anything" she mumbles.
"Everybody can do something" I tell her.

"There's one thing I can do..." she starts "no, forget it. It's to embarrassing"
"Come on, have you seen Wild Kingdom? That guy's been doing it for three decades now"
"Okay, but you have to swear to God you won't laugh"

She takes her lipstick out of her bag and takes the cap of. She puts it between her breasts, making me frown. She then applies the lipstick to her lips, it looks pretty good.

Everyone claps, but Bender keeps his claps slow. "That was perfect Princess, my image of you has totally blown"

"You're shit! You swore to God you wouldn't laugh!" Andrew yells at him.
"Is he laughing, Jockey?" I defend him.
"You fucking prick!"
"The hell does it matter to you? I don't even count, remember? I could disappear and nobody would notice nor give two shits of their shoe for me!" I say, Bender tightened his grip around my waist.

"You know, I have just as many feelings as you do, and it hurts just as much when somebody steps all over them" Claire yells at Bender.

"Don't you ever compare yourself to me Princess! You got everything someone could want, I got the shit on my shoe. Fucking Rapunzel ass, right? School would fucking shut down if you weren't here! 'Queenie isn't here! Oh no' Well fuck off bitch! And what about those earrings?"

"Shut up.."

"Are they real diamonds, Princess?"

"Bender" I whisper to him, warning him to not go any further. But he doesn't listen.

"Shut up!" Claire continues.

"I bet they are, did you work the money for them?"

"Shut your mouth!"

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