his weakness

thirty three

K E N Z I E

"So everything's good, right?" I ask again, I want to make sure my mom is okay.

"Yes. I've been doing a lot better now.. I don't feel weak or anything like I first did." A massive smile plasters across my face, I've been wanting to hear this for ages now. Mom is finally getting better.

"Good. I also need to ask you something." I'm nervous to ask her this the whole time I've been here with her.

"I know, I could tell you've been wanting to ask me something. Tell me, what's up?" My mom has sort of been a little strict with where I go and I don't know what makes me think she will let me go all the way to France with a boy even though she likes Nolan but it's worth asking.

"Since you've been doing a lot better now, I was just.. wondering if I could go France with Nolan." I close my eyes the second I ask, I am literally shitting myself right now.

"France?" It does sound stupid coming out of my mouth, it hasn't even been a week since I've been dating him but here I am asking my mom to let me go with him to a whole different country.

"Yeah. But it's fine if you say no because I'll more than happily stay here and help you with whatever you need. I don't want to sound selfish and I'm sorry if I do." I feel bad asking. She still needs me and I'm here asking if I can go France with my boyfriend.

"Kenz, you don't sound selfish at all. Don't say that and don't apologise. You can go with him, I know he won't let anything happen to you." A rush of happiness explodes in my stomach after taking in what my mom just said.

"Mom. Pinch me." There's no way my mom has agreed to letting me go all the fucking way to France with my boyfriend.

With no hesitation she pinched my arm, it doesn't hurt. No never mind it does hurt. I flinch my arm back away from my mom, while she laughs at me.

"So you're letting me go all the way to another continent with my boyfriend?" Her face drops, sort of. She doesn't know I'm dating Nolan, I haven't told anyone. I don't think he has either.

"Your what?" I mean I can't hide shit from my mom, I always end up telling her something. It's better if I don't lie, she should know I have a boyfriend. Just not that we've fucked before.

"Boyfriend." I'm waiting for her to say something but she doesn't. She smiles.

"You know I've been waiting for a long time now for you to tell me you have a boyfriend, and I'm happy it's Nolan. I like him a lot." Oh wow. Was not expecting her to say that, I thought she'd flip out about me dating especially how things didn't work out with her and dad.

"Mom, you should move on too." Ever since her and dad have had a divorce she hasn't even laid an eye on any other man. I know her heart broke when she found out he married Janice, but she didn't say anything.

"Are you crazy? It's too late now and I'm better off without a man." She's right, she is better of without a man.

"Have you eaten?" We've been talking to each other for the past two hours I have been here for. And I haven't eaten the whole day so I might as well make something for both of us to eat.

"No."

"I'll make something real quick for us to eat, give me two seconds." I have no experience when it comes to cooking. I can sometimes make snacks but other than that I can't cook for shit.

- - -

I left when my mom fell asleep, I didn't want to leave her alone. I know she's doing better, I can tell she is. And I'm happier than ever. But all of that happiness in me vanished as soon as my mind drifts to everything going on with Nolan. I wish he didn't ask me to be his girlfriend, I just wish he doesn't feel the same way as I do about him no matter how much it'd hurt knowing. I know I should be distancing myself away from him but I can't because Kieran knows exactly what I'm doing. He won't leave me alone until I break Nolan's heart.