Secret of a Straight Fudanshi (Pinoy BL - Book 1 of S.O.A.S.F)

Chapter 8 - Rules Are Meant To Be Broken

Ace's POV

Tama ba 'yung narinig ko? Na may affair si Max and Rence? I get that he's not straight and that's fine with me, but the thing is, he's having an affair with a man na may fiance na! What the! Anong klaseng complicated na buhay ba mayroon sila?

So does it mean that Rence is not straight as well since he's having an affair with a guy, and not only that, sa isa pang member. Hindi lang isang rule ang na broke niya, but two! One for not being straight and the other is having a relationship sa member and what's worst is that siya ang creator and ang nag set ng rules pero siya ang di sumusunod.

But then again, it's their business and ang pinunta ko lang dito is all about yaoi and BL and nothing more. If gusto nila ng complicated and kakaibang setup, well, it's up to them and I won't mind. Hindi naman ako 'yung tipo ng tao na magsasabi na "No! Mali 'yan!". It's their problem to start with in the first place.

Does Jeffrey know about this since close siya with Rence? I'll try to ask him later without revealing Max's secret.

I thought na it's all fun and games sa group na to, but kakasimula ko pa lang pero may mga kakaiba na palang nagaganap behind the scenes. Baka 'yung sinabi ni Max is just the tip of the iceberg and mas marami pang nakatago?

"Ace, I just needed someone to talk to. Parang hindi ko na kasi kaya and feeling ko sasabog na ako. I'm sorry na sa'yo ko sinabi." Max said while finishing his cigarette.

"It's fine. I won't judge, although I know I don't have the right para sabihin kung ano ang tama since it's your life, but hindi ba mahirap para sa'yo? I mean he's getting married and yet you're having an affair with him?" I asked.

"Mahirap. Sobrang hirap lalo na kapag nakikita ko silang dalawa ng fiance niya na sobrang sweet lalo na sa harapan ko at lalo na kanina. 'Yung tipong 'I wish I was her.'" Max said with disappointment.

"Matagal na ba 'to?"

"For 2 months na. Pero I don't think Rence is in love with me. I feel like isa lang akong play toy for him but na-attached na ako sa kanya so hindi ko na alam kung paano titigil." Max sighed and took out another stick of cigarette from his shirt pocket.

"Hindi ba parang kinakawawa mo sarili mo? I mean, at the end of the day, it's not you. And sooner or later it will be sinful once na married na sila."

"Alam ko na parang kinakawawa ko sarili ko para sa love na I don't even deserve and alam ko na hindi ko makukuha. But I'm so happy even though it hurts so much. You can call me a 'Masochist' or whatever, kaso I just can't stop loving him."

"And kailan ka mag dedecide na titigil na magmahal sa kanya?"

"Once na hindi ko na kayanin."

"Well, I wish you good luck. It will be a very long and hard journey. I'm so sorry, hindi ako magaling mag comfort ah? Haha! And I don't want to stop you from your happiness. I know it's wrong, but I hope that you'll find the happiness that you deserve. Isa lang ang masasabi ko and I hope that you won't get offended. I think it's not him, si Rence, that is your happiness. Siguro may iba pa d'yan. I'm so sorry if I can't relate to you since hindi pa ako nakakaexperience with a guy and I don't intend to, ever, but 'yun lang ang masasabi ko. I wish you good luck and sana makita mo 'yung deserving for you love."