Loving you...Isn't always easy - soulmate au (Jinkook, Jihope, NamTaeGi)

A lilac in a field full of roses.

23rd may - the day I failed at forgiving myself

Flashback - to a couple of hours before

Jungkook POV:
I stood in front of my soulmate smiling widely, while he looked at me clearly not amused. The venue we chose was beautifully decorated and Jin's parents looked happy. I looked over at mine and saw a smile...a fake one should I say. They weren't happy for me, they were happy to have finally gotten rid of me.

I wish I didn't fail to notice the signs the first time round. The slumped look of my soulmate, the envious look of a girl sitting not so far away. The intimidating gaze of my father and the sadistic look of my mother. I wish I had noticed.

I was so happy, finally I was with the person destiny had chosen for me. I put on my best smile as the priest started talking. We exchanged vows...or should I say I did? I spilled my heart out onto the piece of paper I held and in return I got a few lousy sentences. I quote "I'm so lucky to have you in my life, you're adorable and I can't wait to start married life with you". That's it! I'm not asking for paragraphs but all I wanted was a bit more consideration. Everything he said to me was spoken in a Monotone...no love, no longing or anything in it.

I sighed, I really wish I had known sooner. I wish I didn't let anyone get to me, I wish I would stay strong but in the end I was only a broken child...who grew up to be destroyed again.

Not all of it made me hate myself for today. I mean I had my best friends with me...we were each other's company. They were my lifeline when I decided to give up they pulled me back out. However, even they wouldn't understand my pain because they would probably have soulmates...mates who loved and cared for them. I was just a lilac in a field full of roses.

I also had my brother...he was my everything a lot of the times I felt like the only reason why I didn't give up was him. He loved me so much and was always there. However, when he went off to college no one could save me. That was a story for a different time though.

I wish that I could erase today from my life forever. I don't want to remember it. I hate myself for it. I wish I could blame someone for this misfortunate day but if only it was that easy....

Present

I stood in the living space of our new home...well his new home. I wanted to cry but I held my tears in. He looked at me with pure disgust. I was confused, soulmates only looked at each other with love not disgust, hatred and pure venom.

I was trying to process what he had told me. He said rather bluntly that I was a deal...one that had been thrown onto him by my parents and IF he didn't marry me then he would lose his everything. Well his father's everything. That made me feel worse since Jin's father was a righteous and kind hearted man who worked very hard for what he had.

I looked down clearly ashamed of my parents. "LOOK AT ME YOU DAMN OMEGA!" He yelled and I flinched. My heart rate increased and I wanted to pass out. I was never one to deal with shouting. It made me feel like I was worthless. I slowly looked up with now tears in my eyes. "I married you...but that doesn't mean I will give you the status of my husband. Fuck I'm not even gay. I like women so whatever crap destiny pulled on me won't work. I don't understand why I have a man as a soulmate that to a slut and a whore like you".

I stared at him in disbelief...me a slut, a whore? I had never even had a boyfriend never mind going beyond anything else. I was always locked up and ignored. People bullied me, people would pay to NOT to sleep with me.

"Jin...I have never had a boyfriend before, I'm not any of those things. You're my soulmate why do you hate me so much? Don't you feel the connection? Doesn't your heart yearn for me? Like mine does for you? Don't you look at our soulmate mark and smile because it connects us? Does it not fascinate you that you can talk to me without using your phone or moving your mouth? Just by thinking of me and calling for me in your head you can talk to me. Jin please listen...I thought you wanted this".

He looked at me and smirked. "First of all who said you can call me by my name? Call me master. Also I never fucking wanted you. Your dumb, useless parents put you in my life and burdened me with your presence. IF this was my company then I would have easily rejected the offer of marrying someone like you. However, this is my dad's company and he worked too hard for me to let someone like you and your parents take it from him."

Jin then sat down on the couch and glared at me. "Now the thing about being my mate, I don't care what happens to you, whether you live or die I don't care. I don't yearn for you none of this soulmate crap fascinates me. I just want you to stay away from me, also I will not be taking care of you financial needs. You can fucking do it yourself. I will do whatever I want and whenever I want. You do not get a say. If my parents are here then we act like a married couple. Do you understand me?"

I looked up at him, wiped my tears and spoke with the courage I never knew I had. "Mr Kim" I said knowing I angered him by not calling him 'master'. "I myself don't care if I live or die so it doesn't matter what YOU think. I was excited to finally have a change in my life but you turned out to be life's biggest regret. I dreamed of a happily ever after with my soulmate, I guess I was the unlucky one. As far as money is concerned YOU don't need to worry about anything. I have a cafe I own and I will work there and fend for myself. THANK YOU VERY MUCH."

With that I stared at him and breathed heavily scared of what may happen. I had never spoken to anyone in this manner I hadn't even dreamt of it and now I'm staring into his eyes angry and him looking back at me emotionless. Someone save me.

Jin POV:
I looked at him and could not believe the information I had received in the past couple of minutes. He had never had a partner, he didn't care if he lived or not and judging by his appearance it looked like he never ate. I had to admit he looked gorgeous in his wedding suit...wait what? I shook the thoughts from my head and grabbed his arm tightly.

I walked up the stairs and to his room. He was whimpering about the pain "l..let go it hurts". I smirked wickedly and said "Awh does it hurt my pretty omega? Tough! You should have thought of that before you decided to talk back to your alpha".

We reached the room and I pushed him inside. I wish I had a tinier and more awful looking room but alas this was a house gifted to us by my parents for our wedding. Of course it would be all new and fit for royalty. However, something at the back of my mind kept repeating these exact same words. "If you had given him a cramped room with no bed, no blanket, no pillow and the entirety of the place was cold, damp and dirty, Min Jungkook would still be thankful towards YOU....and EVERY night before he falls asleep he would wish for your well-being and happiness".

With that thought in my head I walked to my own room and sat on the bed. I heard tiny sniffles, whimpering and crying which gave me a dull ache in my heart. What had I gotten myself into?

~~~~~~~~~~~
AYYYY first chapter complete I hope you like it. It's a Sunday and I have classes tomorrow but I just couldn't wait to update so here I am. I do promise to be a lot more active on this story so hope for regular updates.

I seriously struggled to write top Jin with Jungkook. The characters page I put Jin as the omega and jk as the alpha and I kept writing as if Jin was the omega. I don't know why that is...probably because I read a lot of bottom Jin oops 🙊

Anyways, Eat healthy, drink plenty and stay safe my lovelies💜💜💜