"I need someone, that I'll look to,
In the lonely hour, that we all go through
To give me comfort, and love me through
In the lonely hour, I need you."
-Sam Smith
I hung up the phone from just talking to Geniese and Charity and let what she said fill my brain. If you feel like you want to talk to someone else first, let me know.
I didn't know what to do and the only thing that made sense for me to do was talk to somebody about it because too be truthful I was tired of holding on to someone that was willingly to let go and was going through so much.
I had always been there for her, always and I'd never regret being there for her because she needed me and I needed her. She is somebody I love and I proved that when I served those three years in jail for something I commited for her. Something was telling me to give up while another part of me was saying to hold on because she needs me, I just didn't know his much longer I could hold on before I was out of it.
I put on a loose white Tee, a pair of khaki cargo shorts, and a pair of my Jordan's making sure to brush my hair before I left.
* * * * * *
Looking at the woman I had known most of my mothers stay at the home, I smiled up at her and realized that she still looked the same and nothing had changed.
I hadn't seen my mom since I got out of prison so I could understand why my moms nurse looked at me with a look of disgust. Simply because I deserved it.
"Long time no see Mr. Kennedy."
Instead of giving me the chance to respond she left from in front of the door and walked off. I sighed and let my hand touch the door walking in.
She looked up at me from the television and rolled her eyes.
"Now you wanna come see me, huh?"
My mom's legs were gone from an accident ever since I was about twenty years old and she tried doing things by herself for a little while, before she got fed up. She was paralyzed, and I could see in her face everyday it was hard, and since I couldn't help her out like I wanted too ;
I moved her into a home and ever since she's been doing better.
"So tell me why the fuck you ain't came to see me since you got out of jail, nigga?"
"Momma, chill, alright," I paused. "I just been going through a lot of shit."
"So," she paused for a second rolling her tongue. "That don't give you an excuse to ditch your fucking mother at a got damn home knowing you ain't seen her for three years and you walking freely, never thinking bout coming to see to mama that could die anyway from now; but that's right. you don't care, Phonzo."
I wrapped my arms around my mother and she turned her head avoiding me, as I kissed the side of her mocha colored cheek.
"I'm sorry I ain't come to visit you, you right there isn't an excuse, an after I went to see Charity and Gene, I should've came here."
"So your back with that girl and taking care of that child who isn't even yo--"
"Momma it don't matter if she isn't mind or not, I'm all she know and I love her like she came from me anyway. I love her mo--"
"You love them more than love you love your own mama, just admit it. She wouldn't even let you come see me when you came back. It's been two months and a couple of weeks and I ain't seen yo ass. That ho is the reason why you didn't come and see me, isn't it?"
My blood was boiling from the way that she was sitting here talking about Gene. It made me mad as fuck and to hear her talking about shit she ain't even know was more fucked up compared to the fact that she was calling somebody I loved a ho.
"She ain't a ho momma and she ain't the reason why I don't come and see yo ass. You the reason, you sitting here talking bout shit you don't even know about that ain't even your business. I came to ask you about that but I can't cause you too damn worried about to damn self, and yo feelings. I just got out of a small ass cell for three years and all you can do is say me, this, me, that, like damn, you ain't even ask about me."
I didn't even want to look at her face nomore. I got up from beside her bit she grabbed onto my arm before I could go.
"Okay I'm sorry about being selfish, but if you ever talk to me out the side of yo neck like I'm yo child again I'll beat yo ass, boy. Now sit down so we can talk."
* * *
"I believe that you should follow your heart. If you love this girl, but she's saying that she wants you to basically move on, then do what you think is best just don't forget about that child that you say you loved."
"Okay, Phonzo, she's got to take her bath now and it's going around right so were going to have to ask you to leave."
I nodded my head and kissed my momma cheek.
"Love you ma."
"Love you too boy, and I want to see that little girl okay?"
I smiled. "When they get back I'll being her up here. Get some sleep, ma."
I walked out of her room and heard someone crying loudly. I turned and watched a girl that I could only see the side of.
I walked out of her room and heard someone crying loudly. I watched the girl, that I could only see the side of as her light skin was blazing red. I walked over to see if she was okay because it was the right thing to do and nobody else was checking for her.
She had long black hair that was wavy going both sides of her face and I had to admit that she was beautiful. As she wiped her face, I glared at the dimples that sunk into her cheeks.
"I was coming out of moms room and heard you crying. You alright, shawty?"
"Y--yeah I'm fine. I just witnessed my father die, but I'm going to be alright. Is your mom okay?"
I nodded my head.
"She's fine. I was wondering I--if you wanted to go out to dinner then I could drop you back up here to your car."
She smiled, through her tears.
"I would, but the only thing that's opened starting this late is legs and if that's what your out for, you've got the wrong woman, sir."
I chuckled.
"Nah, baby, in not out for pussy, but im out for dinner if your ready?"
She smiled and nodded her head and I focused on her smile for a little making me smile.
Phonzo knew at that moment that was he taking a chance and stepping out of the love that he had for another woman only to go to dinner with another. He felt a pang in his chest at a point, but then he kept thinking about her words and he felt no remorse.
If you feel like you want to talk to someone else first, let me know.
Okay so what so you think about his mother? Was her advice sufficient? Should Gene have told him that and now he's running with it? What about the girl whose father died, his do you feel about that? You guys will definitely be shocked by the ending of this last series book. Who is your favorite character so far from the men? From the women? 50 comments or their will be no update.
