the sweater ~~ jily

a remake of chapter 25.

a rewrite in honor of 100k reads.

thank you all, and here's Chapter Twenty Five, but without the word limit of around 1000, and my new writing style.

Lily lingered in the common room for a while, as the bright, natural light of the moon shone the entire space. Besides the moon, the flames from the chimney flickered in front of Lily, slowly moving. The warmth of the fire comforted the cold she felt inside. The sight of the flames as they joined together only to rise and fall gave Lily some sense of calmness. As the flames slowly burnt out, she lit it again with her wand.

But the beautiful moonlight and peace were not able to make her forget about what she had done before. It did not erase her guilt, it did not erase her feelings for James. It may have distracted her mind, but it did not make everything disappear as she wished deep inside.

Even though she was able to start a conversation with James that day, she definitely knew that he didn't forgive her. Many things would change, and almost nothing would be the same. Lily was smart enough to realize this and decided to stop joking around with Severus. What was the point in pretending she loved James when she wasn't even pretending anymore? Why should she laugh at Severus's jealousy when she can laugh with James, just the two of them?

She wished for many things in life, but the only thing she wished for at the time was James' forgiveness. Lily never realized how cruel she could be until now, being the reason for James' sorrow. She blamed herself entirely.

The thought of no longer spending time with James caused her eyes to become watery, and drops of her own tears fell on her face even before she realized they were there.

But it didn't seem like she was alone. She heard cries that weren't her own. Faint, but it caught Lily's attention. Her head looked in the direction of the sound, and it was under the stairs of the dormitories.

Nobody hid under the stairs except for James and her.

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James hid his face in his arms with his arms resting on his knees. His tears dampened his Hogwarts uniform, and believing he was all alone, he let himself cry, only having himself for comfort.

He's always had friends and those who admired him, but why now did he feel so alone?

Although he was proved wrong when he heard a small knock at the entrance of the stairs, making him lose his train of thought. Whoever this person was honestly had the worst timing, as this was James's breaking point. He did not want anyone approaching him at all, or in fact, for the rest of his li –

"James?"

Lily's angelic voice echoed slightly in the small area under the stairs. James rolled his eyes, thinking how fucked this luck was at the time. Out of all the people in the school, why did Lily have to be the one coming up to him at the worst timing ever?

He quickly wiped his tears away with his sleeve, fixing his glasses to sit on his face properly. He didn't even dare look at Lily, even though he knew she was looking at him. He only saw a bit of her through the corner of his eye.

He coldly responded, "Lily. What is it you need?"

James tried his best to keep his voice from cracking, but it seemed like it had a mind of its own, making it blatantly obvious he was crying.

Lily sighed. "Can we talk? We both know we can't just pretend nothing happened for the rest of our lives," she said gently, slowly peeping her head more into the small corner.

"I wish I could pretend." James faced away from her.

He heard her take a deep breath before speaking again. "Please James?"