the sweater ~~ jily

22.

Chapter Twenty-Two: To Find Out...Again

Lily and James had started the day with a bit of breakfast that Friday. Everything was as normal, Lily still feeling the gut feeling. James pretended he forgot everything, leaving Lily to act as awkward as she could ever be.

Lily stared at the table and James had noticed. "Hey..."

"Y, Yeah?" said Lily, snapping back to reality. 

"Is there something wrong? Something on your mind?" asked James quietly, not wanting to catch the attention of the others.

Lily shook her head.

"If you want to talk about something, I'm here. You seem a little down this morning, did you sleep well?" James asked her sweetly.

"I did, thanks. It's nothing, believe me." lied Lily. The gut feeling grew worse, Lily felt terrible for lying to him. He was happy and she didn't want to ruin that for him. "M, Mostly tired."

"Are you tired of me?" joked James. Lily felt a little better knowing James would still joke and laugh. It reminded her that nothing really changed and they'd be over and forget about yesterday anyways.

"Of course not, you dumb arse," Lily snapped.

Sirius gave them a look then went back to talking about something else. James laughed.

"Shut your arsehole!" he mocked. Lily laughed a little before remembering the guilt feeling and feeling down again. She pretended to keep her smile for the rest of breakfast.

They had separate first periods that day, James having to give up his free period to help the first years. Lily was left alone on her free period to roam the halls.

---

James was sitting in McGonagall's empty classroom with a Gryffindor first year. McGonagall was in the room as well in case James would accidentally say something that would impact the little kid.

"Look." James pointed to the Transfiguration book. He was tutoring a first year, the name of Geraldine. She had red hair like Lily's reminding him of her. "Can you try to pronounce that for me, please?" he asked nicely.

Geraldine looked hard at the book. "Fera...Fera Verto."

James nodded. "Good job." He adjusted his glasses and took the chameleon that rested in front of the book. "You tap on its head three times and say 'Fera Verto'. Can you try that?"

Geraldine nodded excitedly. She took out her wand as James rested the chameleon on the desk. She pointed her wand to it.

"It's going to turn the animal into a goblet, got it?"

She nodded. James watched.

"F, Fera Verto," murmured Geraldine. The chameleon turned into a perfect goblet and James's face lit up. Geraldine had a happy expression on her face.

"Great job, Li — Geraldine!" said James, catching himself before saying Lily's name. McGonagall shot him a look, her lips slightly curved into a smirk. "That was amazing!"

Geraldine smiled. "Thank you!"

James nodded. "I think that's the end of your tutoring today, you did really well," he told her. "I have to get to my classes, too. I'll see you another time."

She nodded, grabbing her books from the table, not putting them in her bag, but holding them to her chest. Just as Lily does. Geraldine finally exited the classroom before McGonagall had said something.

"I see you have a small bond with first years, am I wrong?"

James scratched the back of his neck. "Yeah, I guess."

"Geraldine does have some similar features as Lily, don't you think? The hair, the eyes." said McGonagall while writing something down with a quill.

James blushed. "A bit."

"I noticed you almost said her name."

He stammered. "I, I know, it's just..."

"Don't think I haven't noticed you've been spending a bit more time with her, I have." said McGonagall simply. "Now, not to invade your privacy, but has there...been anything going on between..."

"Oh." said James. "Well, I don't know about her, but I like her. Can't hide that from you, can I?" he laughed.

McGonagall shook her head with a small smile. "No, you can't. I've noticed the sweater, that's why. You used to wear your Quidditch sweater all the time, now she wears it."

James smiled awkwardly. 

"I think I'm taking too much time away from you. You should get going, the rest of your free period ends in five minutes. You should have time for yourself as well. Go on."

He nodded, holding his bag and walking out. "I'll see you then, Professor."

McGonagall nodded, concentrating on her quill and parchment as James walked out the door. He seemed to have bumped into someone as he walked out.

"Ow, damn it." muttered a familiar annoying voice. James looked down and noticed someone who he knew. "Potter?"

"Snape?" James said in the same ignorant tone. He brushed his shirt off as Snape rubbed his greasy nose.

"You, you — "

"What? I'm just trying to walk by. What did I do?" he interrupted. "I didn't see you there."

"Neither did I!" said Snape angrily, crossing his arms.

"Then why are you so angry? I didn't do anything else, we both agreed we didn't see each other, it was an accident, get it over with!" said James, trying to get a reason out of him.

He kept rubbing his nose. "I'm not over, over you and Lily."

"What d'you mean? Not over what?"

"I saw you guys...kiss yesterday. If you're doing this to make me mad, it's working, okay? I'm over it, I'm done." admitted Snape. 

Did Lily know Snape was there that day? Was that why she was acting off? Was that the reason she...kissed him?

James felt his heart break a little, but he still had to protect her. "It's not to make you mad. It's not about you."

"You — you don't deserve her," he spat.

James didn't hesitate. "You're right. I don't. She means everything and I don't deserve that. I know I don't, but I love her and I'll do anything I can do to protect her."

Snape hesitated, looking at his face. He never said anything else. He just walked away, leaving James there heartbroken and sad. He had been lied to.

Ouch.

a/n

my heart hurts too, mAn
Geraldine is based off the actress of Lily Evans in the first movie because she would be in first year when James and Lily were in seventh year.
this chapter (including author's note) is 1,063 words

~the sweater