Chandler's POV
I honestly have no idea where to even begin.
My eyes scan the slightly crowded mall in search of a cheap-yet-cute clothing store.
I start to panic after about thirty minutes of just walking around, so before I can stop myself I'm calling Alex.
"You ok?" His voice sounds happy and I can feel the smile that's probably covering his face right now.
"Yeah, uh I was just wondering what my budget was."
Usually when I go shopping my budget is always however much I can buy without starving for the next week, and because of that I don't really have any particularly nice looking articles of clothing. My clothes are basically bought in bulk off the clearance rack.
"No budget, wait I take that back, don't make me go bankrupt Chasha,"
"Chasha?" Alex has called me Chan before, but never "Chasha."
"It's a russian thing, sorry," his embarrassed chuckle makes my heart go warm and I want to hear it again.
"No no, I like Chasha," I assure through a smile with warm cheeks to match.
"Ok Chasha, I'll see you at the rink in like...forty-five minutes, love you,"
In suit, I answer back with,
"Love you too,"
And hang up the phone.
It's the "I love you"'s that are said on the phone and through text that I never fully understand, because to me they are hard to take seriously. I much prefer an "I love you" when it's said face to face, pressed together, smiling and never wanting to let go of one another, those are the "I love you"'s that I want every time.
I'm surprised it doesn't hurt me as bad as it did before to hear Alex say those three words to me, to hear a guy pour his heart out but not be able to pour back.
Don't get me wrong, it still hurts. Sometimes when Alex goes out I never know if he's been faithful or not and that scares me to death.
I mean he has a reason to cheat, his fiancé can't go out and get drunk with him, so might as well find someone else, right?
I don't know, it's just so...hard. I'm really trying to love Alex and make things the way thy should be when you're a couple, and I think with time it will be that way, but I don't know if Alex can handle it; handle being with one girl.
I don't even know if he proposed to me because he wanted to or if it's because I'm pregnant, but I know relationships have to start with trust, and I know I'm trying. So if he says he loves me, that he's been faithful, that he never will leave me, then I won't do my best to believe him, I will believe him.
My feet carry me into an expensive looking store. I can already tell you that if it was my money I wouldn't be leaving this place with anything, but since Alex insisted on me getting something I start to browse.
"Can I help you with anything?"
I turn around to see a small brown haired woman from which the words had come from.
I answer the way I always answer when store clerks ask me that question, which is with a polite,
"No I'm just looking, but thank you."
The lady smiles and gets back to re-folding some clothes towards the front of the store.
Where do I start? This store probably has the same variety as the Ross that's further down the mall, but it's different because the variety is so nice looking and neat and fancy...and most likely very expensive.
