Idol? Ex? Doctor? What? - english version

Part VIII

Park Chaeyoung

Jennie unnie is so smiling and in a good mood lately, it's like she's been born again or her soul has been abducted and someone else's been put in its place. We're watching dramas and Lisa is quieter than usual, the opposite of Jennie.

"Lisa, what have you got? You've been very quiet these past few days." I nudge her and she doesn't move.

"Nothing, I just know I'm like this." She hugs her knees without looking at me.

"Chaengie's right, Lisa-yah! You look so sad lately. Tell us what happened." Jennie smiles at her.

"What happened between you two that day?" Lisa stares at her and Jennie turns pale.

"Effects of the CT medication and..." Jennie starts talking.

"No, I don't want the excuse she used for Soojoo, I want to know the truth." Lisa says with a serious tone and it's rare to see her that way.

"I got up really fast when I woke up and my head got heavy" Jennie swallows "I was trying to get up and I got dizzy, Jisoo arrived on time and tried to help me."

"AND?" Lisa presses her.

"I kissed her." She looks away and puts her hands on her face.

"DID YOU WHAT?" Lisa and I yelled together.

"I kissed her," she sighs and sprawls on the couch.

"And how it was?" I ask her. Jisoo must be freaking out.

"Oh, Chaengie!" Jennie smiles and straightens up on the couch "It was so wonderful and it was like I was in heaven. When she moved away, the first time, I thought she was going to yell at me, I was really scared and..."

"What do you mean first time?" Lisa says confused.

"And then she kissed me and unfortunately you arrived, Lalisa!" She says irritated "I would give anything to go back to that moment, that mouth and hands squeezing me."

"What about Kai?" I say suddenly.

"What about him?" Jennie looks lost.

"You cheated on him with Jisoo, right?" she turns pale when she realizes what I'm saying and silence settles in the room.

***********************************************

The weekend has arrived and I wake up to the screams between Kai and Jennie echoing throughout the dorm. I cover my head with the pillow, but it doesn't solve anything. I get up and take a shower, hoping that when I leave, everything will be taken care of.

Lisa and I left our rooms at the same moment. We tiptoe into the living room and see Jennie sitting on the couch while Kai is pacing.

"We haven't seen each other for days, Jennie! I can't even remember what day we went out or had a date!"

"My ankle is hurt, how do you want me to go out with you?" she says as if she was bored and annoyed at the same time.

"I'm not talking about that and you know it very well! You're far away, you almost always have an excuse not to see me. Why are you avoiding me?" he kneels in front of her and it seems to take her by surprise.

"Kai, I really don't know what to tell you." She sighs.

"Nini, what happened? Why are you treating me like this? What can we do to resolve ourselves?" He takes her hands between his, at that moment, I feel sorry for him. If Kai had appeared in her life before Jisoo, maybe he had a chance, but he arrived after Jisoo occupied all that space.

"I want to break up, Jongin." She says in a soft and low voice, but we can still hear. It's as if everything around us has the volume at 0. Lisa and I are wide-eyed. We never thought she would be able to do that.

"What? No, Jennie, we can't finish! I love you, you're the love of my life and you know it. This is just a phase." He gets up, desperate.

"Jongin, the love I feel for you is not the same way you feel for me." She says with a choked voice "I really love you, but not in the way you would like."

"It was her, wasn't it?" Kai says and my breath catches, Lisa is crushing my arm so hard it's squeezing.

"It wasn't anyone, Jongin, I realized that during the time I was forced to take it out for myself. I thought a lot and came to this question." She says through tears "I'm sorry for hurting you, I never had that intention."

"Hell is full of good intentions, Jennie." he says in a cold voice. "Are you sure what you're saying? Do you really want to break up?"

"I-I..." she starts to say and stops. A few minutes of silence and she stops crying "Yes, Jongin, we need to break up. I can't make you happy like you deserve and I can't hold you back, keep you from finding someone who loves you like you really deserve to be loved."

"You'll still regret having made that choice, Jennie." he says before leaving and slamming the door.

Lisa and I run to the couch and hug Jennie, who's crying nonstop. She looks smaller than she already is, as if that's possible.