If I Fell│John Lennon/Beatles FanFiction

Chapter 78 - 22.April.1967

Chapter 78

April 22, 1967

Paul stroked his mustache as he looked between John and me. There was a look in his eyes that was so unmistakably Paul. He wanted to know why in the hell John and I weren't speaking, and I sat with my lips pressed tight, avoiding his gaze as best I could.

"Look alive, Liv," Paul said as he crossed his ankle over his knee and grabbed a pack of cigarettes from his coat pocket. He and all the boys were dressing with the times. Psychedelia was everywhere, and for John it was everything. Miniskirts were in vogue, and I'd headed to Carnaby Street with Mo multiple times on shopping trips to pick up the latest fashions. Now she sat across from me, her eyeliner dark and her fingers intertwined with Ringo's as she leaned forward to chat with a woman I didn't recognize.

"Are you implying that I look like some sort of zombie?" I narrowed my eyes and shook my head at the comment.

Paul smirked. "You said it, not me."

He wore pinstripe trousers, a striped jacket, and a thin scarf around his neck. He immediately handed me a cigarette as if he knew I needed one...which I very much did.

"Ta, Paul," I said as I gripped the cig and crossed my legs, tugging at my miniskirt. My hair tumbled over my shoulders as I tipped forward to get a light. With our lit cigs, we leaned back in the private booth, and he looked at me again, scrutinizing my every feature.

"We only just got here, and you look moments from plannin' yer escape," Paul said before pulling in a drag of his cig.

"I don't really wanna be here," I admitted as I reached for my glass of scotch. I pulled in a long swig, letting the liquid burn as it slid down my throat. But I was thankful for the feeling because at least it was a reminder that I was well on my way to getting bevied up.

"Well, why the hell not?" He tossed an arm behind me and let his hand rest on my shoulder. "Can't be the company cause you've got me sittin' right next to you, and I'm some of the best company there is."

"I don't wanna get into it." I gripped the ciggie and averted my eyes. "Not right now, anyway."

He hummed in response as his foot shook to some beat. "You not wantin' to be here, it have anythin' to do with John's foul mood?"

"He's in a right shiny mood...dunno what the hell you're smokin'." I rolled my eyes and shook my head. John stood near the bar, speaking with a bloke I didn't recognize. He had his glasses over his eyes, a half-empty glass in his hand, and was drinking faster than I'd seen him drink in years. 

"Sure, sure." Paul nodded as he smirked. "Just like yer right shiny mood. You two could light up the entire room."

"We just...well, we got into a bit of row earlier. Then I thought it best for me not to come tonight, thought maybe we needed a moment away from each other to settle down. But then we got into another row 'bout how I never go anywhere with him." I pushed a hand through my hair and sighed. "So here I am, out. Just like he wanted."

Paul leaned in closer, his lips now tipped into a frown. He was like a goddamn predator with his instincts, like he knew that he could dig deeper now that I'd started talking.

"You two all right?" he asked, his voice low.

It was such a loaded question, but the short answer was no. No, we were most definitely not all right. For so many reasons.

John had tried for weeks to get me to give LSD another go, but I couldn't begin to imagine putting my brain through that again. My second trip was enough to last a lifetime. Although there were glimmers of an enlightening experience, my mind focused only on the frightening images.