If I Fell│John Lennon/Beatles FanFiction

Chapter 12 - 3.Oct.1960

Chapter 12

October 3, 1960

I was dead on my feet as I gripped my bag to my body, my hand twisted around the strap. My body swayed a bit as I walked behind an elderly chap, descending a few stairs and then stepping onto the platform. I pulled in another breath and tried to steady myself, but it seemed I couldn't bloody be upright without my world tilting. My head ached as I walked, but this stop was my last. I'd made it.

Hamburg. I knew I was definitely there because I didn't understand a bleeding thing anyone around me was saying.

The station bustled with people on the move, women hurrying with children in tow to catch a train, and men strolling along with not a care in the world. People were coming and going, not giving me a second look as I collapsed onto a bench outside the station. There was chatter around me, and the trains chugging along their tracks reverberated, their brakes screeching as they arrived at their destination.

The sun shined in the sky above with only a few clouds floating aimlessly on an otherwise beautiful day. There was a gentle chilled breeze, but the sun brought warmth that fought to overtake the cold air. I was thankful for the sun because it gave me an excuse to wear my large, oval sunglasses to cover my eyes. I'd been given a few strange looks on the train as I wore them even while inside, but I knew those looks were far better than the looks I would've gotten if anyone had seen what the glasses were hiding.

The journey had been long. After running from my house until I thought my legs would give out, I ended up on a bench in front of the Liverpool train station with a long night ahead of me. My promise to John had outweighed anything else even as my mind could barely put a clear thought together. I hadn't slept a wink on that bench, too afraid of what might happen if I let my guard down. Every noise was my father, at least in my knackered, paranoid mind. He was looking for me, I was sure of it. My mother's ring was too important of a thing to give up on. So I sat alone in the darkness, my heart racing for hours on end, waiting for the sun to rise and for people to awaken to a brand new day.

When the station finally opened, I was the first person inside, hurrying to buy a ticket. The faster I could get out of Liverpool, the better.

"Where to?" the man had asked me, his eyes narrowing as he frowned at my appearance. He didn't seem concerned, rather just disappointed that I'd be seen in public looking such a mess.

"Hamburg," I replied without a moment's hesitation. I pushed exact change and my passport to the man. He scrutinized my passport, and I barely breathed, praying he wouldn't notice anything strange about it.

With my ticket gripped between my fingers, I'd slipped into the loo at the station. I shoved the ticket into an inside pocket of my jacket before peeking at myself in the cloudy mirror. It was no wonder the man had looked at me strangely. The sunglasses did their job covering my black and blue eye, but my split lip was caked in dried blood. I was still dressed in my work clothes, my pencil skirt ripped at the bottom, and my hair a disheveled mess.

When I'd had enough of looking at myself, looking at what my father had done, I found my way into a tiny stall. My head spun as I changed out of my clothing and into an outfit that would hide my bruises, a black long-sleeved blouse tucked into a plaid skirt that hit a few centimeters above my knee. Everything ached as I pulled on my stockings, but I refused to acknowledge the pain, too focused on the singular goal of leaving. After I pulled my knotted hair up and covered it with a hat, I carefully placed my sunglasses back over my face and shrugged my jacket back on. Without looking into the mirror again, I hurried to the platform.

Time seemed to pass at a strange pace as I waited. And when I was finally on the train, I was worried I'd fall asleep and miss a transfer. So I chose not to sleep, refusing to succumb to the train's lull, tempting me to close my eyes. I guzzled water and smoked to help keep me awake.