Our World

Chapter 12

Jade's POV:

"Wait, so you never fell down the stairs?" Perrie and I are sitting on the couch and spent the last hour talking about what happened to her.

Perrie slightly shakes her head. "I just had to give you a reason for my bruises and cuts."

God, I have been so stupid. She lied straight to my face multiple times and I didn't notice it. "I'm sorry I didn't realize you were hiding something so big from me."

Perrie grabs my hand and rubs her thumb over my knuckles reassuringly. "Hey, no, don't do that. This is in no way your fault."

"It's not yours either, Pez. Do you have any idea how many times you have blamed yourself for what happened while you were telling me your story?" Perrie looks taken aback by my sudden outburst, but she doesn't stop me.

"All through your story, you were mentioning these little things: I should have made sure my battery wasn't dead, I should have taken another route, I shouldn't have worn that skirt, the list goes on. Don't do that to yourself, Pez. The only person to blame here is that sick fuck who did this to you. Do you understand that, Perrie?"

Perrie's eyes fill with tears and I know she doesn't believe me. She still blames herself. "I'm going to remind you of the fact that it isn't your fault until you believe it," I say sternly as I squeeze her hand.

"Thank you, Jade, for all of this." Two arms wrap around my waist and pull me close into Perrie's body. Her scent surrounds me and it is the best smell ever. She pulls me closer to her, so I'm straddling her lap.

Her hot breath hits my collarbone, which sends shivers down my spine. My heart is beating so fast I swear she can hear it in our current position. The blonde almost makes me lose control when her soft lips press on my collarbone. My breath hitches in my throat and I pull back slightly to look into her eyes.

My favourite pair of blue eyes look different from what I have ever seen. They are completely filled with love, combined with another emotion I can't quite decipher. She looks gorgeous right now. "Your presence always calms me down. Even if you don't realize that." 

Her slender fingers start tracing up and down my sides under my shirt and her eyes are fixed on my lips. Everything in my body is screaming to lean in, but I find the strength to ask the last question still on my mind.

"I'm sorry, but I just have to ask you this one thing. It's been on my mind since I found out and I just want to know your thoughts." My beautiful blonde nods while her eyes tear away from my lips to look into mine.

"I understand why you would try to drink yourself into oblivion and I get the partying and stuff, but there's just one thing I don't quite get. Why did you start sleeping around? I thought you would be scared to do it again. I think I would be, but you weren't. Why?"

Perrie doesn't hesitate before she answers as if she had this answer ready for me. "I just want to try and forget how it felt with him. I just hoped that one time it would feel so good I would forget how it felt like with him, but it never worked..."

Her hands are still under my shirt and I feel myself lean closer to her until I can feel her breath on my lips. "Maybe it will only work with someone you really trust and love." Perrie closes her eyes and her hands squeeze my waist. "Maybe," she breathes out, her lips graze over mine so lightly I'm not sure it's even happening.

"HEEEY BITCHEZZZ!" I jerk myself away from Perrie and land on the ground with a loud thud. What the hell.

Leigh and Holly walk into our house with everything that's needed for the ultimate girls night. Although I'm very glad to see my two other best friends, this was really the worst moment possible to barge into our house.

"Hey, Pezza, how are you doing, babe?" Holly asks, sitting down next to Perrie while giving me a questioning look. I quickly stand up from the ground and make my way to the kitchen to get everybody something to drink.

I decide to make everybody margaritas for two reasons. One: all of us love margaritas, two: it gives me some time to recover from the situation that just happened.

I was going to kiss Perrie again. What does that even mean? We never even talked about our first kiss, but this time, we were sort of insinuating that it would go further than just kissing.

This was honestly a mess. I rub my eyes and try to focus again. Perrie needs me as a friend, not as someone who is going to confuse her even more.

"Jade, what the hell are you doing?" Holly walks into the kitchen, shooting daggers at me with her eyes. "I'm making margaritas, Holly."

"I mean with Perrie, you smartass." Her arms fold over her chest and I can see the fire in her eyes. Yep, she is definitely mad.

"She just told you about one of the most traumatic experiences of her life, and you are trying to get in her pants. Get it together, Thirlwall. She is your best friend and she needs you. As much as I love Jerrie, this is not the right time."

I sink down in one of the chairs at the counter and rest my head on the table. "I know, Holly. I don't know what came over me. I just can't think straight when she is so close to me ever since we kissed and..."

"You two kissed!?" I grunt and try to hide my face in my arms cause an angry Holly is the last thing I need right now. "Keep your voice down. I don't need Perrie to know about my confusing thoughts. I'm just going to try and figure out what this all means to me first."

Holly steps closer to me and pulls my head up. "Look, Jade, I know you love her and you're the best friend Pez has ever had. Don't ruin it if you're not sure about your feelings for her." She takes a deep breath before continuing. "What I'm saying is, keep your distance until you have figured this whole thing out." She says, tapping my forehead.

She's right and I know it. On the other hand, I really don't want to keep my distance from Perrie.

But was this really about me? I should be thinking about Perrie and she really didn't need me as anything other than a best friend right now.

"Yeah, you're right, Holly. Let's get back." I take two margaritas and walk into the living room. Perrie is sitting on one couch while Leigh lies stretched out on the other one.

Against all my instinct, I walk over to the couch where Leigh is lying, hand her a margarita and lift up her legs to place them on my lap once I sit down.

Holly smiles at me when she sits down next to Perrie and hands her a margarita. Perrie is looking at me questioningly from the other couch and I try my best to avoid her gaze. But every now and then, our eyes meet and she just looks really confused.

"Cheers!" I yell before downing my margarita.