My Happy Place (a Drarry Texting Fic)

20

Draco: tf do I do, Pansy?

Pansy: don't tell me ur whining about what I think ur whining about AGAIN 🙄

Draco: mommmmm this is serious T-T I literally don't even remember most of what I said but it's been awkward since that dumb fucking phone call. Why tf did you guys and my fans have to tell Harry to check on me?

Pansy: well it worked and ur alive so I regret fucking nothing.

Draco: ofc you regret nothing ur not the one who was on a phone call with their crush while drunk AND high 🙃

Pansy: okay, okay, just hold on. I'll think of smth, yeah? How would you feel about a hike?

Draco: ???

Pansy: I just texted Potter, he said he'll be there 😉 I could just make excuses for the rest of us then u and him can have a day together, sound good? 🤩

Draco: ugh. I don't like hikes. But Harry. But hiking. But Harry. But hiking. It'll just get MORE awkward and I don't wanna do that, fuck what could my stupid gay ass possibly have said I'm such a piece of shit 😭

Pansy: okay yk what I'll make it a group thing, yeah? That way you can just pull him away from the rest of us and talk. It'll probs be less awkward if you see each other irl

Draco: Idk idk fuck

Pansy: damn Draco Malfoy being the panicked gay, never thought I'd see the day 🥴

Draco: 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻

Pansy has created groupchat 'Wizarding Whores'

Hermione has been added to groupchat
Blaise has been added to groupchat
Harry has been added to groupchat
Draco has been added to groupchat
Ron has been added to groupchat

Pansy: heyyyy sexy people 😘

Hermione: babe...? Wanna explain this?

Harry: I'm at work and one of my co-worker just saw this group name which is GREAT 🥰

Hermione: damn Draco's rlly done well, look at that sarcasm use ✨

Blaise: mommmmm hi what's up??? I've got a gig but I'm hiding in the bathroom so spill the tea mami what's going on 👀

Ron: I'm totally gonna pretend that I wasn't the last to be added 👨🏻‍🦰

Blaise: aww won-won :((( u woulda been first on my list boo 😘

Harry: don't call him that, he might get flashbacks. Remember Lavender Brown wonny??

Ron: okay, fuck you for that I'd rather not recall such a thing

Blaise: agreed 🙄

Pansy: jelly much? 💅🏻

Blaise: I can neither confirm nor deny that statement 💅🏾

Ron: huh??

Hermione: clueless as always 😪

Pansy: ahem, ahem, attention all!! I sent everyone an invite to go on a hike together. Thank you to everyone who said yes. Meaning Blaise and Harry, the latter most likely out of politeness. And now, on to the honorable who denied my RSVP. Ron who said "I'm scared of heights, sorry", Draco who is conflicted cos he's a dumb fucking bitch and lastly my future wife who said many colourful things, the last of which being "can you get out I am trying to read and I am not afraid to cut out tongues to do it" before slamming the door in my pretty face

Hermione: ummm I'm sorry I got too invested... ur face is the PRETTIEST love 🥰🥵

Pansy: mhmm 🙄 now to those who are undecided, ur coming, end of story.

Ron: Pansy I rlly am sorry but I've legit never gone hiking, not rlly ready to die yet yk? 😅

Blaise: Godddddd, he's adorable 😭 can we adopt him or smth I literally can't?!?!!!!??

Draco: eww, no, the family is full thanks

Pansy: Dray don't be a little bitch about possibly having a new little brother 😒

Ron: Umm... Do I get a say in this?

Draco: honestly? No.

Blaise: Mom I changed my mind, I actlly wanna whisper something to you real quick

Pansy: Aight step into my office =)

Harry: ???

Draco: means they're gonna dm.

Ron: Ohhhh. Makes sense.

Hermione: I already knew that. We're together.

Harry: We know 🙄🙄🙄

Hermione: Bitter 💅🏻

Harry: ffs

Pansy: We're backkkk and don't worry, you are my son no more. But you are definitely my son-in-law 🤩

Blaise: Mom!

Pansy: Shh. Chut. I'm talking, here. You know moms always love the son in laws better, except if they are gross. So... Yeah. So happy! Blairon, ship for the ages

Ron: Umm... Again, when did I agree to this??

Pansy: Come off it, u two were getting all cosy at the beach, Herms and I were eating pizza watching you from a window

Ron: Blaise, we talked about this. You know exactly why I can't let you do this.

Blaise: I heard you loud and clear and I still don't give a damn. Gimme one date. Let me show you how special you are to me. I follow my instincts, red, there is something here I'm sure of it.

Ron: We're gonna go talk alone right now. Umm... Whisper. So bye, everyone

Blaise: Umm... Okay? Bye bitches 👋🏾

Pansy: and how about you and Draco, Harryyyyy? How's that going 😉😉

Harry: Umm... Okay bye!

Draco: What he said, bye mom✌🏻

Hermione: baby I love you but your kids are something else.

Pansy: I know, love. You'll learn to love em. Why do 21st century men make things so hard? Ugh. Good thing we're not from around these parts. I'm a pirate with nasty teeth and a hunger for blood and treasure.

Hermione: And I'm a siren who lures you in, then falls in love, having never seen a woman before and only gross ugly dudes.

Ron: ouch.

Hermione: Well shit I did NOT mean it like that 😅

Pansy: Aww bby now I want a kiss 🥺

Hermione: And I'm gonna give you one, thanks for suggesting the hike, I was just so into this book but I need to get out of the house anyway and you're always the one who reminds me not to be a complete recluse. What would I ever do without you?

Pansy: Die probably, my sweet 😘😘

Blaise: NOT ON THIS GC, GO TO YOUR ROOM I WILL NOT LISTEN TO MY MOM FLIRTING OKAY?? I DRAW THE LINE.

Ron: Blaise 😑

Blaise: Coming Ronnie 😊

Pansy: simp. Anygay, let's continue this conversation irl bb. We'll see you guys soon, the hike this weekend!!

A/n: This book is not the best... But eh. It's almost finished, might as well.