Preview – The B* is back
SH: So I've never met a nerdy naughty scorpion before? JK: Naughty? SH: Oh, it translated incorrectly, I mean sexy. JK: You spoke in Korean. SH: It's Christmas time. I was thinking of what to get you. JK: Oh, I have the same problem. What do I get a naughty ice prince who has everything? SH: <tears up> You think I'm sexy? JK: No, naughty. SH: Aren't they synonymous? JK: Depends. SH: Oh yeah, I know what you mean? JK: WTF.
SH: I want something that will make me look cool, but hot, elegant, yet sizzling, tempting yet approachable. JK: You sound like a condom ad? SH: You think I can sell condoms? JK: I think you would overwhelm hospital capacity. SH: What are you saying? JK: Most people would buy anything you sell, unless they're a vegetable. SH: As long as I'm not liable?
JK: <shook> I can't keep up with your nonsense. SH: <shook> I can't comprehend yours. JK: So you counter with more nonsense? SH: Isn't that what we love about each other, we get each other. JK: Do we? Do we really? Aren't we in a game of survival? SH: Are we, you mean with each other? JK: No I'm referring to the iLand. Shouldn't we have spelled out SOS by now since it doesn't look like we are time-warping out anytime soon?
SH: So with your scorpion side, does that mean you like to dominate your partner? JK: <triggers a mental chess game in his head to ensure a winning hand> I fold. SH: Isn't there a 3 fold repetition rule? JK: How do you know that? SH: I played a grandmaster in one of my kdrama. JK: What's the point of going to school, when you can learn everything from kdrama. SH: <nodding> right? JK: <shaking his head> I wasn't serious. So do you want to play chess? SH: No, that would require too much thinking for nothing.
JK: But you like to scheme? SH: True, but only if it yields what I desire. JK: And what is that? SH: Oh that was good, I almost showed you my hand. JK: As long as you're not offering it, I'm good. SH: It's important we understand each other. JK: That goes without saying. SH: But I say it first. JK: I abstain. SH: From what? JK: From where ever you're going with this. SH: Nowhere. JK: Exactly.
SH: Well, I actually had something in mind, but I lost my train of thought at some point watching you spell HELP upside down like a kid. JK: What was it? SH: How should I put it. So are scorpions into menage a trois? JK: Aren't scorpions the jealous type? Well, this one would perform a vasectomy on the two-timer free of charge. SH: Wait, did you just show your hand? JK: That was hypothetical
SH: Oh, Well it's sounds kinky. I was going to invite you to my soiree. JK: STFU. Oh, now I know what to get you, an ice prince Hoonie Nutcracker. SH: I already have several, actually a collection, because I did the Nutcracker on ice. It sold out, better than the ballad version with my quadruple axel into a triple lutz then a backflip. JK: In a play? SH: Hey, competition is a state of mind, no one outshines Hoonie.
JK: I'm more into double S. SH: Boobs? JK: No, soccer and stocks. SH: They don't mix. JK: Like us? SH: No, like water and oil? JK: Who's slick? SH: You have to ask? SH: So I think you would have like ballet on ice with my form-fitting tights and top that highlight my triangular upper body, perfect proportion, alluring movement & amazing beauty that's just chef's kiss, iykwim. JK: No, F* no.
SH: Not very original. JK: But this one will be from me. I'll paint and dress him, it will be special, one of a kind. SH: Don't tell me, you're one of those who wants to crack my nuts, cuz they're jealous they can't have me. But it's different with you Jakey. So was that a no?
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