3:30 am
L O C A T I O N : armin and eren's apartment
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"bro, deja's car is outside-." eren started as he walked into armin's room. what he saw was armin and i laying in his bed as i tried not to cry again. "oh shit! i didn't..." he trailed off but armin waved him away. "can you call deja and tell her that her car is here?" armin asked, rubbing my back and holding me close. eren nodded silently, walking out and grabbing his phone.
i cherished that armin stayed up with me while i wrapped my mind around everything. i couldn't just go to sleep after that. the idea of having someone help me felt so foreign and it scared me. i had my doubts with armin. in my mind, armin wasn't gonna stay long, he was gonna leave once he felt like i was too much. in my heart, armin cared for me and he was gonna deal with me to the end. my mind was winning in this argument.
i sniffed, wiping my nose with the sleeve of my jean jacket for the 100th time. "do you need tissues? i have tissues." armin said softly, pushing some hair behind my ear and leaning down so i could hear him. i nodded but when he got up, i felt so cold.
"hey," he whispered. "i'm only getting you some tissues, i'll be back okay?" i blinked back some tears, letting him go to his bathroom before coming back to me. he handed me some tissues and i blew my nose and wiped my tears. armin got back into bed, leaning against the headboard while i laid on his thigh.
"you have work tomorrow don't you?" i asked, "you shouldn't be up with me." the alarm clock reading, '3:34 am.' "i don't care, i can always call off." i didn't argue. there was no point anymore when it came to arguing with armin. he always won and that annoyed me. my nose was stuffy, my breathing coming from my mouth instead and my face probably puffy due to me crying for hours at a time.
"what do you think would have happened to me if i stayed."
my mind was running 80 miles per hour and i needed to think out loud.
"dakota, don't think about that." armin reprimanded. "do you think he would have..." i trailed off, not having the energy to say the word. "stop talking like that, kota," he shifted his position due to his leg going numb from the dead weight. armin shifted me as well to his lap, this position was more comfortable. my head laying in the crook of his neck.
"i can't help it." i mumbled. his arms were wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer to his chest.
"let's stop thinking, okay? tomorrow is sunday and we need a recharge before this week, remember we have your parent's dinner to go to."
fuck.
i forgot about the dinner, the whole reason armin and i were even talking. going from this to that in over a couple of days was not good for my mental health. i groaned, "i don't think i have the strength to do that."
my parents lived in miami which meant that we had to get on a flight friday so that we could get there a day early. i needed to talk to jasmine about where we were gonna stay because i'd be damned if we stayed with our parents. having a airbnb somewhere near the water would be good, it would make the trip worth our while. i needed to go shopping, pack my bags, make sure my professors knew that i would be missing a week of school. so much to do in little time.
armin kissed my cheek, his lips grazing the surface of my skin like he didn't want to hurt me. "we'll have fun, i'm sure we can fly the rest of the group up there with us." i didn't think about that. i wouldn't want to leave kiana and deja alone in our apartment since it would be jasmine and i leaving. i nodded, sleep finally hitting me like a ton of bricks.
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