Bad Choices || Auston Matthews

20

All of my test results came back, I got both of those pregnancy blood tests done and boy oh boy, I am indeed pregnant. They said that with my hormone levels, it's looking like I'm about six weeks pregnant, which was about two weeks ago, so that would mean I'm about eight weeks, now. I have an appointment to talk about everything and get an ultrasound to get an accurate due date.

I stopped taking my birth control and started taking prenatal vitamins. I'm not sure what I wanna do in terms of the thing inside of me. I'm not sure if I wanna keep it, give it up or yeet it out of my body.

If they were correct about how far along I appear on the blood test, that means that the baby is Auston's. There's no possible way it could be William's child.

"Sadie Jameson!" The nurse called. I got up and we did the usual things that are done at the beginning of every appointment. We got to the exam room and she asked me all the usual questions. There was an ultrasound machine in the room, so I know for sure I'm gonna be getting an ultrasound.

"The doctor will be in momentarily, please get undressed from the waist down" she told me, handing me a sheet to cover my lower half. She walked out of the room and I quickly undressed.

-

"Knock knock!" My doctor said as she opened the door.

"How are you doing today?" She asked, taking a seat.

"I'm alright, I'm still not sure how I'm feeling about this situation" I sighed.

"Well, if you want, I can give you resources, so you can go over all of your options. Don't feel obligated to do anything you don't want to, if you don't want to be a parent, you don't have to be. This is a safe space" she assured me. I smiled. I know she couldn't see me smile since we have to wear masks.

"Thank you, I appreciate it. It's all I've really been thinking about since I found out" I told her.

"Not a problem, are you okay with having an ultrasound done to see how far along you are?" She asked. I nodded.

"Alright, since you're probably still early on in pregnancy, it'll be easier to do a transvaginal ultrasound. After I get the wand prepped, I can let you insert it, if that'll make you more comfortable. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable" she told me.

She turned on the ultrasound machine. She coated the wand in the gel that they put on your belly for ultrasounds, then she put a condom over it and put a generous amount of lube on it.

She had me scoot to the edge of the bed and put my feet in the stirrups. She inserted the wand, I winced at how cold it was and the pressure from her moving it around.

"There's the amniotic sac that your fetus is in, it's that black space and that gummy bear looking thing is the fetus. I'm gonna get some measurements and I'll be able to tell you how far along you are" she explained. I wasn't sure how to feel about this pregnancy but I'm also amazed by the fact that a thing the size of a gummy bear is just chilling in my uterus.

"It's looking like you're about eight weeks and three days, which puts your due date at.... April 18, 2023. Would you like to hear the heartbeat?" She asked. I nodded. She played the heartbeat and my eyes started to well up. I really have something growing inside of me. It's part me and part Auston.

She printed out the ultrasound and handed it to me.

"I'll like to see you back in about a month to make sure you're still doing okay. If you decide on terminating the pregnancy, please let us know, so we can plan your care, accordingly and get you back on birth control after the termination. Or if you have any heavy bleeding accompanied by cramping, go to the emergency room and call us as soon as you can, so we can make sure you're okay" she told me. I nodded.

She walked out of the room, so I could get dressed. I got my clothes back on and went to the front desk to schedule my next appointment.

-

I'm back home now, I'm planning how I'm gonna be telling Will that I'm pregnant but he's not the dad.

"Sadie, are you okay? You've hardly touched your food" Kody asked. He came home early from work and brought back Chinese food. Usually, I'll put away some Chinese food but the stress of being pregnant and being nauseous all the time, has really put me off from eating.

About a week ago, I started having morning sickness, which is more like all day sickness and all food makes me feel like I'm gonna throw up. I know I should be eating properly but I can't bring myself to do it.

"Sadie, seriously, are you okay?" My brother asked, again. I sighed. I got up and went to my room to grab the ultrasound picture off of my dresser. I walked back out to the living room and handed it to Kody. He stared at it for a solid minute before saying anything.

"You're pregnant?" He asked. I nodded.

"How far along are you?" He asked.

"Eight weeks and three days. I'm due on April 18, 2023" I told him.

"So, you and Willy are gonna be parents?" He asked. Oh my God, does he ever stop with the questions?

"Not exactly... I cheated on William while he was on vacation. We've already discussed it, we both cheated on each other. The score is even. No big deal. But, Auston is the dad. I don't know how to tell either of them" I replied.

"Jesus Christ, Sadie. You're gonna have to tell them quick" he told me.

"I know..." I sighed.

"You know, Corey and I have your back, no matter what. We'll support you, no matter what happens" he assured me.

"I'm just scared that if I keep this kid that I won't be able to take care of it. I don't wanna be like mom." I admitted.

"Your big brothers are never gonna let you turn into mom. You are so much better than mom, you're acknowledging the fact that you're not sure if you can care for a child. Mom was on drugs and was living in a roach motel and decided to purposely get pregnant three times, just for the hell of it. You're nothing like her" he told me.

He stood up and gave me a big bear hug, I am so lucky to have brothers that care so much about me. I couldn't ask for better brothers.

I just need to figure out how to tell Will. He gets back next week, so that gives me three days to figure out what I'm gonna tell him.