You Don't Love Him

Happy Birthday, Susie

December 20, 2019

Sue turned twenty-nine years old yesterday. It was a Thursday so she had decided to wait until Friday evening to celebrate with her friends. Emily, too, just turned twenty-nine a couple of weeks back and she ended up going back to Amherst to celebrate with her family and just grabbed drinks with her close friends, Sue included, when she arrived back to Boston. Jane offered to host a party at her apartment since she had the space for it. Like Jane's party back in early October, it would be all of the same people since their friend group was pretty tight knit in that sense.

Emily and Sue had been on weird terms over the past week—and Sue knew the exact reason. She had went to the bridal store and finally picked out a dress for her wedding last weekend and Emily had been very short with her all week at work—not making any advances, not flirting with her like she had been doing, and keeping everything strictly work professional. She wasn't texting her outside of work nor walking her home like she had been doing previously. Sue felt hurt by this, truly, but she knew she shouldn't because she was the one engaged to get married—Emily wasn't. And this thing they had going on, whatever it was, was starting to get too much.

Sue hated to admit it but there were definitely feelings brewing up on her end and she knew the same was happening for Emily, but the dilemma of being engaged and already doing so much for it was starting to stress Sue out. She loved Emily—they had been best friends for nearly twenty years now—but now she wanted Emily. She wanted Emily in a way that was more than a friend. She wanted all of Emily. But then there was just the guilt of it all—guilt because she's been cheating on James and guilt because she's still planning to marry him when she's slowly starting to realize it may not be the best idea for all three parties involved.

But Emily was upset with her, and she didn't blame her for that. Sue wouldn't be surprised if Emily didn't show up to Jane's for the party with how things have went over the past week. The last time Emily and Sue had been intimate was on the snow day. They continued to flirt and test the waters until Sue went to pick out her dress. Everything was going great and now everything was not going so great.

When Sue and James arrived at Jane's apartment, everyone was already there—chatting and catching up over snacks and drinks and party games—everyone but Emily, of course. Sue scanned her eyes across the apartment as everyone started shouting 'Happy Birthday!' at her and lifting their drinks for her big day. To say Sue was disappointed to see everyone there and not Emily was a complete understatement—she had feared she wouldn't show up but she didn't think it would actually happen. Sometimes Emily was known to be fashionably late, so Sue hoped that was the case in this situation.

"Happy birthday, Sue!" Austin said, walking up to her and James. He put his fist out to James, "How's it going, bud?"

James fist bumped Austin's fist and put his arm around Sue, "It's great, man. Happy to be here celebrating my girl tonight." He said, pulling her shoulder closer as he placed a kiss on her temple.

"You guys are great together," Austin said, smiling at the both of them as he took a sip of his drink, "Love is hard to find."

'If only he knew his sister was fucking me. He'd think different.' Sue thought.

Sue cleared her thoughts and wrapped her arm around James' back and looked at Austin, "Where's your sister?" She asked, bluntly.

Austin looked around the apartment just to realize she hadn't been in the crowd, "Huh..." he said, still scanning the rooms, "That's funny—I thought she had already arrived, but I guess not. I'm sure she'll be here. She wouldn't miss your birthday, Sue."

"I hope not." Sue said under her breath, squeezing James.

He looked over at her, "Everything okay, babe?"