Chapter 12 Feelings

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Chapter 12

The next night before arriving to Barbados, was a little less awkward at bed time

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The next night before arriving to Barbados, was a little less awkward at bed time. But for obvious reason, Jungkook avoid try to get to close before bed. It did help to release some of his tension of having him so close and not be able to touch him, by masturbating before going to bed. But the thoughts Jungkook had, when he was doing so, were a little disturbing. At that moment he was enjoying those images in his head, all the things he wanted to do. And all involved his dick and some part of Jimin's body. He wanted him hard, he wanted to destroy Jimin with pure pleasure, fuck every hole in his body, taste every inch of his skin, buried himself deep into his ass so hard that Jimin would scream in pain, and even imagine the sound of his scream give him shivers.

Not long after Jungkook was able to release that tension he felt, but it didn't come for free, because after his orgasm, he felt awful, he felt like a beast, like a fucking animal who can not have self control. He could never make love to Jimin like that. But he just don't know to do it in a different way, then came the realization that in his mind, while he is fucking Jimin, he never stop and see what Jimin might be feeling, look back at his expression to see if he was enjoying it. It was like in that moment the most important thing was his own pleasure, and Jimin was just an instrument to achieve it. He stared to remember Jimin's words when he said that he was scare that if he said "no" no one will listen.

"Would I listen? Would I even be aware of his feelings if I'm having sex with him? Or would I just take what I want like I always do? I never needed to be aware of the other person's feelings, I just focus on my pleasure that, I don't even know if it's possible to get out of my stupor just to check on him" Jungkook thoughts were keeping him awake in the middle of the night.

Jimin was sleeping peacefully next to him, his face look so calm, illuminate by the dim light of the moon that shine through the window. Jungkook stare at him for a long time, just watching him breath in and out, then he stare at his lips, those lips that have been the source of his fantasies. Jungkook give a feather like kiss into Jimin's lips and then got up front he bed, he needed some fresh air. It seem like masturbating before Jimin came in to the room, wasn't enough anymore. Jungkook could feel his arousal building up, so he needed to got out of there for a moment.

Jungkook was on the deck, looking into the dark deep sea in front of him, the moon was so big and bright, making it possible for Hoseok, who was doing his last check to the Night Shift workers, to see Jungkook standing my himself.

"Can't sleep?" Ask Hoseok. When Jungkook saw his friend, he just shook his head. "It's Jimin ok?" He added. Maybe that was the reason why Jungkook couldn't sleep, perhaps Jimin was sick or something.

"He is fine, he's sleeping right now" Jungkook reply.

"What's wrong?"

jungkook took a long breath, unsure if he should talk about his feelings. Hoseok is his best friend, but he never felt comfortable opening up about his sex life, but Jungkook felt clueless about this. He always had consensual sex, but now he realized it wasn't mutual sex, because he always took but never gave.

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