Written In The Stars ☑️

CHAPTER 17

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"Where are you going at this hour?"

I was opening the gate when I heard mom's voice behind me. "Partying." I simply answered. I lied. I was on my way to Top's place. He invited me, Boss and Jeff for an overnight drinks and video games.

"What are you doing to yourself, Gulf? What's happening to you?"

I scoffed. She's unbelievable. "That's a lot coming from you, Ma. Why don't you ask yourself the question?"

I saw how her eyes widened in shock. "Gulf!"

I crooked a smile. "This is what you wanted right? For me to live the best life? I'm actually doing what you want now. This is the best life ever. You should be happy."

I got a slap from her in return.

I closed my eyes from the pain. She was old but indeed still strong. Her slap stung. But I got back to my senses and bravely looked at her again, tears started forming in my eyes. Fuck. Why am I always emotional?

She was fuming this time. "How dare you say that to me? How dare you blame me? How could you make me feel like... like I was the one at fault in all of this?"

"I didn't say it's your fault, Ma."

"You're making me feel like it!"

"Then what else do you want me to do? What else, Ma?" I raised my voice but I didn't mean it. I really didn't know what to do anymore or how to even please her. My desperate tears came falling. "We did what you wanted. He left us. He left me. What else do you want me to do?"

Then she cried. I saw her crying for the first time. It was a shock but I still held my head high.

"I... I'm your mother... And I only wanted what's best for you, Gulf..."

"And you thought driving Mew away is the best for me?"

"Yes!"

"Why?"

"Because it is wrong! Everything about it is wrong!" She shouted. "You are brothers! You are both men. Don't you hear me? Do you understand, Gulf? What will people say when they hear about this madness? Aren't you even concerned at all?"

I looked at her in disbelief. Was that all that she cared about? Did she only just think about people's opinions rather than her own sons' feelings?

I sadly laughed at the revelation. "I don't care about other people's opinions at all, Ma. Mew didn't, too. We only cared about you. We knew we're going to hurt you so we hid it first. But telling you about us was in the plan. We really wanted to tell you about us. We didn't like lying but we did and we're sorry. You're the only one that mattered to us. Other people don't. Who cares about their fucking opinion?"

She kept crying.

I continued. "We didn't mean it, Ma. We didn't mean to fall in love with each other but it happened. We love you. We're your sons and we love you. Mew loves you very much. I know we hurt you but we're hurt, too. And you know what's worse than him leaving us? It's the reality that he's gone. I can't find him now. I want to go to him but he purposely disappeared thinking he broke this family, our family."

Mom kept sobbing and holding her chest at the same time.

It was hard to look at her. I caused all her tears and it was painful. I closed my eyes and composed myself before I spoke again. "I'm sorry, Ma. It's just... It's just that it hurts. It still hurts. Everyday it hurts and it's driving me crazy. I'm so sorry..."

I turned and opened the gate. I left without another word.

Instead of going to Top's house, I went to Hillside. It's a park with an overlooking view of our town. I just texted my friends that I won't make it tonight. Luckily, they didn't ask more questions. I was thankful. They knew I wasn't in my best temper these days. Even Boss who's the nosiest of all wasn't asking too much information. He could tell Mew wasn't around. He probably was just being careful.