Deep into Despair | xBayani

Chapter Twenty

*WARNING* this chapter has waves of feels in it *WARNING*

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Naria's POV

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"Will!" I scream as I see him. He is looking over the water on a tall bridge outside of the amusement park. It took me a while to find him. I searched the whole park only to find that he wasn't anywhere.

I jump into his arms because I miss him for the time I wasn't with him, but to keep him from jumping in any way. "Will, please think about this. I love you so much," I say tears verging to well up in my eyes once more. My head lays onto his chest as I hold him tight.

Will starts to cry, while holding onto to me. "It's too much," he whispers to me, as he silently sobs. "They hate me, they know everything, and they're not going to stop. I'm worthless, I need to be gone."

"'You don't have to change in order to be happy. You have to love and accept yourself and be confident in your choices. Act from love.' Remember I'll be here for you. What they say is not true, listen to me, I care, Jordan cares, your fans care, you're not alone. These spirits, don't let them control you, you're better than that. Think about what you're doing,"

"I can't, I can't," he sobs helplessly. "I'm doing it." He lets go of me gently and starts to climb over the railing. People start to look over at us, and I start to feel more helpless than ever. Now I know how Jordan felt when I was in the hospital.

"Please, Will," I plead, tears streaming down my cheeks. "Think about me." I start to sob violently. I grab ahold of his arm, right when he is about to jump, but my grasp isn't tight enough. My hand slowly loosens from my grip, and the world seems to slow down around us. My sight is blurry from all the tears.

"I love you," he whispers before he fully lets go of me. "Tell Jordan that I really do care, I wish the best for you and Jordan."

I see him fall completely. I break down crying, nothing's going to be alright ever again. My best friend....

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Will's POV

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I never thought I would let go, but it was my time and I was ready. I see Naria's tears as she cries. I can't help but feel guilty for leaving her, the cube, my fans, and especially Jordan. I can't fathom the love I have for them all, but the love for myself is so nonexistent that I have to let myself go. All I can say left is that I truly love them. I just don't love myself. So now, it's time. Goodbye.

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Mitchell's POV

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I scream for Jordan, but he falls unconscious so fast that I can't help. I run over to his unmoving body. I try carrying him to a bench, but he's so fucking heavy. Though somehow I manage to. I quickly call 911, unsure of what to do. His breathing isn't steady, and his pulse is not clear so that's what you do in this kind of typical situation right?

"This is 911, what is your emergency?" I hear the administration say through the phone.

"My friend's unconscious, and his breathing is not normal. His name is Jordan Bayani. I don't know what to do. I'm currently in __________ amusement park."

"Okay, keep calm, and we're on our way. Do you know any of his medical information?"

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Beep Beep

The nurses were using machinery to check Jordan's health. Now, it's been going on since. I waited for hours, and he still hasn't woken up. Now it's 5am. Insomnia has been getting to me for awhile and it doesn't help that I'm in a hospital that has the most uncomfortable chairs.

I also heard about Will. I've been praying for his survival, but the doctors haven't been saying much about him. I feel especially bad for Naria, her boyfriend and her best friend both are not in their best conditions. Why does this happen during Pax?

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Naria's POV

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I sit in Will's room crying. I've been crying for a long time now. Jordan and Will are both in the hospital. I stare at Will's pale face. His eyes are gently closed, and the doctor had decided to put him on life support. I grab his hand, and brush my hand against his. The same feeling I had when I was trying to stop him. Mitchell and Ryan had been watching over Jordan for me. His condition is not as bad as Will's, but neither of them have woken up yet.

I sadly look at his scars on his wrist, when has he done this to himself? Why hasn't he told me? I brush my fingers over each one and think of every single memory we ever shared. I miss him so much. Why did this have to happen?

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I walk to Jordan's room on the third floor of the hospital. I am greeted by a friendly nurse. She looks at my face, noticing my dried tears, and the dark circles under my eyes. She smiles pitifully at me, and leads me inside. I sit down next to Ryan, and take in Jordan's unpleasant conditions. His hair is messed up, and the heart monitor doesn't show him doing well.

I did this. The thought ricochets through my mind, and punches me in the stomach. More tears start to fall. I cover my face with my hands, as my hair starts to get in the way of my sight.

Ryan starts to rub my back. "It's okay, it's okay, just calm down. Things will be alright,"

I take in his words, but things are going to be different, not necessarily 'alright'. But then again, I always say that too, so who am I to say?

I cry for a long time, blaming myself for every single thing I've done to hurt someone. No one understands. I'm just me, in my little shell soon to rot away, and when I do, the world will be happy and then things will finally be alright.

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Thank you to NarwhalLover10 for helping me write this chapter!

I'm trying to have at least 1,000 words for each chapter, but I'm not just going to leave you guys here so I will update you soon.

ALSO remember if you're ever feeling this way, you are never alone. I added these things to the story to add onto the drama and plot. There are suicide phone lines to call and I'm here if anyone needs to talk. Just a little reminder. :)

Btw I quoted Devon, if you see it, than you're awesome. :D

Thanks for reading! Love ya guys!