Between us ~ Martin Garrix

chapter twenty eight

An uncomfortable distance fell between the couple as they walked across the bridge. Out of the corner of her eye, Lily noticed Martin taking frequent glances at her with feared eyes and she felt guilty she couldn't help his worry. After all, she was the cause for it.
"Can't you just talk to me now?" He sighed, scratching the back of his neck as they reached the end of the bridge over the river Zaan.
"We're nearly there," Lily responded, still failing to look at him. She knew if she did, she'd fall weak at the knees, forgetting the purpose of this and begin to cry. Minutes of silence later, they found themselves at a familiar bench, led by Lily. The green windmills spun quaintly, the river almost still. It was dusky, not pitch black and blizzard like last time they were here. The bench had some droplets of water on, but right now that wasn't important. Lily pulled her cream jumper over her sleeves and sat down, crossing her legs on the bench in front of her with a sigh. For the first time all day, she allowed her big brown eyes to fall onto her love, inviting him to sit down next to her.
"What's going on, lily?" He whispered, his voice somewhat shaky.
"I don't want to leave you, Martijn. I don't want to leave this country," Lily began, fiddling with her fingers as she stared at the puddles forming on the floor.
"But?" Martijn anxiously questioned, his eyes still fixated on her.
"But I went to the doctors today about my symptoms, like you asked me to," she continued, a burning feeling in her throat as proof of her anxiety. "They said it's likely the severe pain is in fact my bruises. And internal damage. But also, I'm pregnant."
Martijn stopped breathing for a second, his mouth opened slightly and his eyes dropped from the girls face, to her stomach, then to the floor.
"You-your, sorry what?"
"Im so sorry, Martijn. I thought my pill and my disorder was enough of protection. I've ruined your life, and that's why I said to Josie it would be selfish to stay. You've worked tirelessly for where you are today and with a baby in the way, I'd hate that to restrict your touring and your studio days and work in general. That's why I told Josie I'd leave you to be young and free and hard working. But I couldn't stay here with our memories, with the safety net you've helped me build and not you. So I'm looking at going back to my mums." The girl sniffed, shaking as she released her inner feelings. "I'm so sorry." She noticed he had been silent for some time and this was not helping. But she knew it was a lot to take in.
"Why on earth would I want that, Lily?! You're having my baby! I've never wanted anything more, not even when I was 14 practising in my bedroom, I wanted to be big and famous, but I also wanted to be loved, I watched my parents and their beautiful connection and I wanted that more than anything. I got what I want in terms of fame and work and Im grateful of that, I never expected to find my soul mate too. God damn Lily, I've been fucking ring shopping. I look at children's clothes as I pass a shop, and every time I think of you and the future we can hold together. And please, if you'll let me, this will be that beautiful future! Please, Lily-Rose, don't go. Not from me, not from here," Martin pleaded, his eyes leaking repeatedly down his cheeks as Lily's did the same. She was shaken and shocked, she had never expected this.
"You, you want to start a family? You want marriage? You want...me? Forever?" She gasped, sniffing Im new found happiness.
"I have since the day I met you," Martijn wrapped his arms tightly around her, placing strong kisses all over her face causing her to giggle slightly.
"I love you, Martijn,"
"And I love you, I love you both. So much."