The Pain that Lingers

Chapter nine: Open Doors

Lucy 

I walked in the house when dad came to pick me up. I missed the fresh air, and open space. 

I inhaled the smell of our home. Mom lit up some candles in the kitchen. She was reading in her chair. 

"Hey honey. How was the trip?" She asked, putting her book down. I sat on the couch across from her. 

"It was eventful..." It really was.

"What happened?" She asked, showing real concern over my well-being. My mother always knew when there was something wrong. That's what loved about her. 

I took a deep breath, "Clay and Alyssa secretly dated behind my back. That's the reason why he broke up with me..." I explained trying not to cry. My mom motioned me to come sit next to her and so I did.  

She caressed my face. "Oh baby. I'm sure they didn't mean to fall in love. Sometimes if people love each other they want to protect you from the truth. The truth can either make you or break you." She said, she was right. She always is. 

"But they did. How am I supposed to forgive them for that?" 

"I don't know. But I know you have a big heart, and you forgive people because you love them. I'd hate to see you lose your longtime friends darling. Don't make the same mistake I did. What does she mean by that? I always observe people no matter what. I guess I get that from my dad. Speaking of my dad, he went right back to work when I got home. 

"Thanks mom." 

"No problem. Now go and relax before you have to go to school tomorrow." She said. I forgot about school to be honest. I was too wrapped up in the Clay, Alyssa, Jadeyn and Marcus drama that I forgot to focus on the one thing that matters the most to me. 

I wrote in my journal about what happened when I was in Manhattan. 

I need to get my emotions out. 

Once I was done writing in my journal, I let out a sigh. I heard the door open from Logan's room and talking. How are these asshats still here? My bedroom door was open, Logan's room is literally straight down the hall from mine. So, Logan always walks by and so do his friends. I was about to shut the door then my eyes looked into his. 

I was about to close the door, but then Jayden said something to Logan wanting to talk to me about something. 

"What are you doing here?" I asked with a stern voice. 

"None of your business. How was the trip?" He asked. 

"Why do you care?" 

"I don't,"

"Good. Then leave," 

"Nope," 

"Why not?" 

"I make the rules," 

"Not in my house," I said. 

"Want a bet?" He said moving towards me. He was too close and invading my personal space. 

"Get away from me, Jayden," I said. 

"I like torturing you every day. It gives me a great amount of pleasure," he said. I winced. How could he say something like that when he barely knows me? 

"Why are you doing this? You don't even know me," I said. 

"Oh, believe me I do. I know everything about everyone," he said. 

What is that supposed to mean? Logan better not have told him about dad, or I swear to God, I will kill him. We agreed as a family no one knows. I rolled my eyes and he finally left. Thank God, he is starting to infuriate me. 

_______________________________

Past

Alyssa, Tyler, and I rolled up at the party. 

It was crowded like really crowded. Everyone was parked on the curb all throughout the neighborhood. 

Manhattan is a spectacular place. 

Alyssa told me she was meeting with Clay, and I told her that's fine. I held Tyler's hand as we entered the house. It smelled like booze, weed, and drugs. I don't like it here. I'm not someone who enjoys parties. 

"Want a drink?" Ty asked. 

"Sure."  

He handed me a cup when he returned to the deck outside. I took a sip and nearly threw up. 

I finally was able to get a hold of myself, "Gross, what was that?" I asked. 

"Whiskey," he said planting a kiss on my lips. 

"You know I don't drink..." I said reminding him of why. 

"Oh common, it won't hurt you. Just live a little!" He said lifting me up to sit on his lap. When I sat on his lap, I felt something poking me. I'm only a freshman, I thought. 

Tyler stared into my eyes, and I think he got the wrong message. He started kissing me deeply, affectionately and with great passion. I admire him for his passion and desire. I gasped for air after we tongue kissed for almost what felt like three minutes. His lips curled into a smirk, and his eyebrow was arched. I was feeling a little tipsy after having some whiskey. My eyes felt like it was going to fall asleep. It was only one? How could whiskey possibly make me sleepy? 

"Tyler. I'm tired," I said. 

"There's a bed upstairs!" Tyler shouted over the loud music and people. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. Damn, this boy is strong, I thought. People moved out of the way so Tyler could carry me upstairs. He brought me to a quiet bedroom and lightly put me down on the bed. 

"Thanks baby," I said touching his cheek. I was drifting away. I felt Tyer plant kisses all over my body. He kept pressing down hard on my lips which hurt really bad. 

Present

__________________

I put down my old journal I had from a couple of years ago. 

I can't believe I revisited that memory. 

I can't help it sometimes. 

I shouldn't be reminiscing about the past. I am an overthinker, my memories are very vivid. I can remember any big event that has ever happened to me, even the ones that traumatized me. 

It was around ten at night and I had to sleep to go to school tomorrow.