The Pain that Lingers

Chapter six: Living Like Liars

Lucy 

Is everything around us a lie? The people, our family? I always wonder who is being truthful and who is lying. It's like my mind is bombarded with negative thoughts about the people who I'm surrounded by. Trust for me goes a long way, if I do not trust you there is a good reason why. I am someone who is not open about my issues. I guess I need to be if I want to make new friends. 

My problems with myself go far back, way before my dad was almost murdered. If I try to bring up the past, it brings up painful memories. The thoughts lingers in the back of my mind and I try to distract myself. Sometimes, I think I lie to myself. I am not proud of that, but I am working on it. 

"Hey darling, ready for school?" Mom asked waking me up. 

"Not yet," I said. My mom, my beautiful mom. She had the same hair as me, only her eyes were hazel green. Her skin was a perfect olive tone complexion. Though her hair was more wavy than curly, mine is pin straight. She is a loving mother, kind and caring. She would break her back for me and my brother. 

"Time to get dressed. I am going to make you and your brother breakfast," She said opening my blinds. I really did not want to go to school; the events of this weekend has my brain mushed. I didn't want to face Marcus and Jayden either. God, if Jayden told Marcus I knew about his secret I'd be dead right or beaten up, either one. 

I put my ugly school uniform on. The one reason I hate private schools is these uniforms and the skirts especially, I'd say I am more of a jean and t shirt person; I'd rather wear something that is comfortable to my liking and won't make me distracted all day. I went downstairs and mom made us pancakes and French toast. I took the French toast because I wasn't feeling that hungry. 

Once I was done eating breakfast I got in the car and drove off to school. Dad couldn't drive me today because he had to go to a meeting apparently. The sounds of students shutting there lockers startle me. The loud sounds of people walking and rushing to class make's me hate Mondays. It was raining outside and flooding, thank god I put my hair in a ponytail; when it rains my hair frizzes up, and it does not look pretty. 

I saw Karina by her locker, she was talking to freaking Marcus? What is she doing talking to him? I lowered my head and walked to my locker which was on the other side of the hall. I had ten minutes before the first bell rang, I just want to get through the day without causing any problems. I grabbed my English, Math and Chemistry book since these are the classes I have before lunch. 

In the corner, I see Jayden with the girl I saw the other day when he was talking to her. Were they dating? I can't tell with anyone these days. Long Island is just a fast paced environment compared to the city. At least people in the city know what they want. Speaking of the city, I am going to visit Clay and Alyssa this weekend and I can't wait. I haven't spent time with them much and I desperately miss them. My Dad say's it's okay as long as Alyssa's parents keep an eye on me. 

Jayden catches me glancing at him and his "girlfriend". I lowered my head even more and scurried to the bathroom. No one was in here, so I basically had the bathroom to myself... Or so I thought. I didn't see who it was at first, then I looked up. 

I gasped and backed away as soon as I realized who it was. "You can't be in here." I said. He scoffed. 

"You think I give a shit? I saw you glaring at me and my girlfriend, are you jealous?" He asked with a smirk. I scrunched my nose in disbelief at what I'm hearing. "No, please stay away from me." I pleaded. He grabs both of my arms and pushed me against the wall caging me in. "Don't act like you are not jealous." He said with his face inches from mine. 

"Jayden seriously, if you have a girlfriend why are you so focused on me?" I exclaimed. "Get out of here!" 

"I'm really not. You just keep trying to stick your nose into other people's business and it's going to stop now." He said with venom. What is he talking about? I shook my head and rolled my eyes. "Whatever Jayden. Please just go, the bell is going to ring for class in two minutes." I said. He did as told and left. I let out a deep sigh of relief. The bathroom was at the end of the hall where my locker was. No one really uses this stall because there's only one bathroom stall. 

I walked out and quickly sauntered down the hall to my first period class which was English. My favorite subject is English, I love writing. I even have my own journal I write in every now and then. My teacher Mrs. Sullivan is a sweet old lady, she is in her mid sixties and loves to teach, she has been at this school for a long time apparently. Marcus was in my English class sadly, but he normally never shows up. How do these boys even pass school when they're dealing drugs? 

"Alrighty class, I want everyone to pay close attention to this assignment. I want all of you to write a three page essay. Secondly, I want you to choose a topic to discuss it can be based off of anything. You have the freedom to choose. There will also be a pre writing assignment before you turn this one in that is due online on Friday!" Mrs. Sullivan explains. As she explains the assignment details Marcus walks in. Mrs. Sullivan doesn't stop her lesson, I give her props for that. Marcus sits in the seat behind me, I feel a little uncomfortable, I wonder if he knows I know about his drug deal... I hope Jayden did not tell him because if he did then I'm screwed. 

Once English class was over, it was time to head to second period and third. Before I make my way to my classes I needed to put away my English textbook and grab my Chemistry and Math textbooks, the last class of the day for me is usually study hall. I am taking History and harder classes in the spring, which I am not at all excited about. 

I sighed, everything seemed to become more stressful. I wish I had my best friends, I'll be seeing them soon so I don't mind the wait. I need Friday and Saturday to come by quickly so I can head into the city to surprise them. I saw Jayden no where in sight and I let out a sigh of relief. The only reason why I hate this school is because of him. He makes my life a living hell, and I don't know why. What did I do to him that was so bad? 

I question everything, sometimes in a good and bad way. My thoughts consume me, but I never act on my thoughts. I find other ways to cope, also in a good and bad way. No one can know my secret, or his. That would expose us to the man who tried to kill him. I'd rather have no friends than have everyone know my secret because no one can be trusted at this school.

Hello everyone, welcome to chapter six. Hope you guys liked this one, the fun stuff will come soon!