My Best Friends Brother

Chapter 53

MILO’S P.O.V.

Holy fucking shit.

How the fuck...? My neck is still pulsating where he was just sucking on it, and my skin feels alive with roaring flames of passion from the way he was touching me, but all that pales in comparison with how my heart is now racing looking out at what he’s created here.

He did this... All this... For me?

I stand at the highest point of the auditorium, the seats around me coated in darkness as the night sky above envelops the room. It’s fucking gorgeous, I remember being captivated by this place once before but everything seems so much more beautiful now. The stairs below me are only slightly enchanted with a delicate glow from the side lights, but it's enough to see that each and every one of them are covered in a scattering of white rose petals. He bought fucking rose petals... fuck.

Following the flow of flowers down the stairs, I see the usual free standing seating has been completely removed, in their place a large fluffy blanket and soft pillows cover the floor, along with a fully set up picnic and drinks alongside the discarded duffel bag that he brought in with us earlier. This is what he was setting up when he ran off? He must have planned this for...

“Miles? Is it okay?” Okay? Is he fucking kidding me? I can’t stop looking at it, it's literally a fucking picnic under the stars! He’s created a dream date I couldn’t ever believe I’d ever have. “Oh shit, it's too much isn't it? Fuck, look, just forget it and we'll go back to the-”

I grasp the back of his head and slam my lips down onto his just to get him to shut the fuck up. I realise I haven’t actually said a word since he let me look out at the glory of what he’s made here but he needs to give me a fucking minute, he’s completely taken my breath away.

We kiss, and kiss, but my mind doesn't get any clearer. How the fuck am I supposed to put into words how he’s making me feel right now?

I’m not the kind of guy that gets this stuff, I’m not Jayce with Lee on a boat or Steve turning hospital gardens into luxury retreats for Brie. I’m the guy that gets a cheap slice of pizza on the ride home, I’m just a secondary character in most peoples books, I’m never the leading man...

Until he made me his.

“I’ll take that as you do like it then?” He pants as I finally let him breathe again.

There are still no fucking words to explain what this means to me. Instead I just take his head in both my hands, letting the tip of my nose brush his as I hold us together, but keeping my eyes closed out of fear that they'll give away the emotion raging inside of me right now.

“You have no idea how much... I can’t believe you did this.” My hands are shaking but they refuse to let him go, his own palms rubbing up and down my forearms to try and relax the tension I know he can feel. He knows he’s fucking got me here.

I honest to fuck can’t remember the last time I actually felt emotional, I used to let everything get to me as a kid but now I keep most of my shit to myself. I don’t think he even realises that he’s crumbling my walls further and further with every day that I spend with him, even when I’m talking to him or just being near him. He’s finding a place for himself inside me that no-one else ever has.

Taking my hand in his, he walks us down between the seats until we reach the bottom, rose petals dispersing with each step. I look over at the front row as we glide on past, it’s exactly where I was sitting with Aleah and Jayce when they brought me here. It was probably the last time I had anything close to a perfect moment, before now.

I was so young back then, nobody really noticed how a kid that stayed that quiet always seemed to know everything. It’s because I could fade into the background, go undetected and see what everybody else refused to. I saw the way he looked at her, how his whole face would light up whenever she smiled at him. They thought they were so clever sneaking around, but I saw it from the very first day that she moved into our house and we sat around the dining table having food.

He loved her, he’d always loved her. She made him better, for a brief time I actually got my brother back. Then it did what it always did, went to shit.

I know they’re good now, I know everybody is just finally happy to see them happy, but it came at a cost that nobody wants to admit. For three years I lost my brother, lost my sister, watched my mum lose herself in depression and my dad bury himself in work. For the first two years I tried everything I could to bring everybody back together, but it wasn’t enough, I wasn’t enough.

By the time that people realised those two belong together, I’d already began to shut down, I couldn’t take the hurt anymore. It feels like I was living someone else’s life by the time they sailed off on a boat without either of them truly saying goodbye. Then when they came back Aleah was already pregnant with Heather, they had their own family to be getting on with, there wasn't room for me in it anymore.

I know they didn’t mean it, they still don't. It’s just that some days, I wish we could be back here again. That I was just this smiling little kid sitting between my hero big brother and caring big sister, knowing that I’m one of the most important people in the world to them. I’d like for one day to not just be an afterthought, the guy they only invite to the lake house because other people dropped out, the brother whose game’s they come to only after the tenth time I remind them that I have one.

I’d like Jayce to not look at me like I’m just a little fuck up who will never compare to him anymore, Lee to remember that there was always one person that supported them no matter what.

I’d like to just be their Milo again, just once.

Josh stops as we reach the edge of the picnic blanket and I know I must be smiling huge again by the look on his face, as I realise how much fucking food he did. The guy definitely knows that the way to my heart is through my stomach.

“I didn’t know what you’d want,” He says scratching the back of his head. “So I kind of made everything. Well, the girl at the cafe did. I can’t cook for shit.”

Reminder to self; Get May to teach me how to cook. Otherwise we’ll be living off take-out for the rest of our lives.

It has to be after midnight right now but after running all over this building with him for the last few hours I’m absolutely fucking starving. We both sit down on the blanket and he immediately starts shoving sandwiches onto my lap. He wasn’t joking, did he seriously order everything they had on the menu? I don’t know if it’s the sweetest or most hilarious thing when he reaches behind him and I realise there’s a whole other platter of them. He does realise it’s just the two of us right?

The stars on the screens above us move slowly throughout the faux night sky, Josh starts playing some quiet music through his phone before moving into the space next to me. I was actually okay with the silence before he did it, they never seem to be awkward when I’m around him, but music is good for my soul. Maybe I should tell him about...

“So, you guys all came here together a while ago right?” He asks through a mouthful of bologna and cheese sandwich.

I nod whilst chewing a bite of my chicken one. “Yeah, it was a few years ago now when they had this star gazing show thing on. I was obsessed with going to see it so I was on cloud nine all day. I’m pretty sure I was so exhausted after it was done that Jayce had to carry me back to the car, Lee let me raid the gift shop first though. I think I’ve still got that giant planet somewhere that she bought me... Did you and Steve do stuff like this growing up?”

Josh shakes his head. “Not really, we didn't really get to see each other that much after he moved back with his aunt. He’d call to talk to me when he could, always made sure he sent presents for my birthday and stuff, but we didn't really get to see a lot of each other in person until he came here for college, by then I was in high school.”

“But you guys are still really close now?”

His smile tells me they are before his words do, it's clear that the two of them have a very special bond. I’ve got a lot of respect for Steve, he didn't have to make sure he maintained that relationship with Josh but he did. Guess it's kind of like May and me in a way, two siblings who found each other later on but couldn’t live without each other now.

“Yeah, really close. Kind of killed him when I moved away but he got it, he had to live in Germany for a few years before that so he appreciated why I had to go... May will probably feel the same way when you go off too college... Considering how close you guys are, I mean, you tell her everything right?”

Why is he wiggling his eyebrows at me like that? What does he-

“Oh I’m going to fucking kill her... She told you that I told her about us?” Josh chuckles, nodding his head and grabbing another breadstick from the pot.

“Yep, gave me the whole ‘you hurt my brother and I’ll kill you’ talk and everything...She was just looking out for you, it’s not a bad thing, trust me.”

Still going to kill her. Can that girl seriously not see the irony in the fact that see felt completely valid in threatening my very nice guy but blew her lid when I did the same thing to her dickhead one?

“I’m sorry,” I say, lowering my sandwich and reaching over to grab one of the sodas. “I should have spoken to you before I told anyone, it wasn't exactly planned. I just kind of needed to talk to someone about everything... She won’t say anything if that’s what you’re worried about. May is a lot of things, but the girl knows how to keep a secret.”

He smiles up at me, resting back against the pillow and staring out at the abundance of stars before us as I pass him a coke.

“It’s fine Miles, I’m glad that you had someone you felt you could talk to about all this. You won’t meet more loyal people than the Parker sisters. It’s pretty much why we all keep Brie around despite the fact she's a fucking walking disaster area. There is no one you’d rather have on your side if the world was ending than one of that pair.”

Ain’t that the truth.

I smirk as I remember my conversation with Brie at the dress store. “Is that why you told her and Lee you were dating some really great guy?”

Josh begins to choke on his coke, coughing and spluttering whilst desperately trying to wave his arms in his own defence. Didn’t think I’d find out about that huh? Does he realise yet that nothing stays secret for long in this weird little overly co-dependent family we’ve found ourselves a part of? I laugh so hard that I end up falling back onto the pillow behind me at his side, guess I’m not the only one that can't keep my mouth completely shut about finding an amazing man.

“It wasn’t like that.” He preaches whilst attempting to calm his throat with another swig of his drink. “They fucking cornered me, you know those two have fucking voodoo powers or something that make you just spill your guts. I swear to fuck I did not mention anything about you personally, they could just see I was really happy and wouldn't let it go until I told them why.”

I can’t hold back the smirk that makes its way onto my face. I already knew that was the reason, but it's still really fucking cute to hear it from his lips, hardly anything had happened between us at that point but I was still making him fucking happy.

Josh notices my face and leans over to shove my shoulder as I begin to laugh through my cocky grin. Moving his pillow across, he lays down flat next to me until we’re both just staring up at the eternal abyss above us. I start to place the patterns of the constellations together as his arm falls next to mine, our knuckles brushing together whilst we let the mountain of food we just consumed settle deep within us.

“In the interest of total honesty though, I did tell someone.” I turn my head to look over at him but he’s already looking at me with those big ocean blue eyes of his, a man could seriously fucking drown in those things. “I told Charlie, and his husband Han technically. They’re kind of the reason that I could do this whole date, is that okay?”

I rack my brain trying to figure out where I know that name from, when it suddenly hits me.

“Charlie? Do you mean that skinny guy from your office who was eye-fucking me the minute I walked in?”

Josh chortles hysterically whilst nodding his head, before turning to his side and resting his hand on my hip. He probably doesn’t even realise he’s doing it, but I swear every time this man touches me I relinquish what little control I have over my body to him.

“That’s the one, he’s actually a really nice guy once you get to know him.” He chuckles as his fingers begin to tickle up into my waist and then back down onto my hip repeatedly, the array of tingles he leaves behind forcing me to turn involuntarily to allow him better access, bringing us face to face. “They both really want to meet you, but I told them it’s way too soon for that kind of thing.”

It is? Of course it fucking is Milo, this is only your first official date with this bloke, stop running away with the idea of running away with him. You can’t jump straight into the middle of a relationship, this is only the beginning... For him anyway.

We talk about everything, and nothing, all at the same time, for what feels like minutes but was probably hours. We finish the food, the night continues to spin around us, but time and time again we just find ourselves floating back into that position. Laying together, my eyes locked with his, his hand somewhere on my body igniting the eruption of sparks only he can cause me.

It feels like every breath we take only draws us nearer, until finally our lips are only a hair away and all I see is him. I could be in the most beautiful place in the world right now, the clifftops of Hawaii or the canals of Venice, and the view still wouldn’t be a match for the one I currently see before me. Everything about this man is captivating, he's had a hold on me for longer than he could possibly ever know, yet it’s only expanding with every minute longer I’m blessed by being with him.

My eyes are growing tired but I refuse to let them close, I know the moment they do he'll make us leave, and I never want to fucking leave him. Being here with him is everything I never even hoped it could be.

Our bodies meld together on sheer instinct, our legs wrapped around one another and chests pressed united as I find my hand wandering up the skin of his arm, only to revel in the sight of his eyelashes fluttering as he lets the prickling bliss wash over him like a wave of unrivalled beatitude. His arms hold me so firmly that I begin to forget what it was like to not have someone be able to embrace me in this manner. Being in his arms is the most serene form of self-sacrifice.

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