Earned Trust

chapter 28

You got out of the elevator into your floor after a quick chat with Nat. It was already midnight. But when you stepped out of the elevator, you saw Loki, standing right in front of your door. He turned around and noticed you, his hand still in the knocking position.
"I thought you were still in your room." he said as he took few steps towards you. "I would like to talk.." he added quickly.
"I heard already." you mumbled as you looked him into his eyes.
"Heard what?" he asked in confusion.
"I heard what you said to Thor a while ago." you told him. Loki looked bit shocked but then he sighed heavily and rubbed the back of his neck as he walked closer.
"I'm sorry Y/N.. I-"
"No." you stopped him. "I don't blame you, just only those morons who don't know where the line lies." you continued. You really didn't want him to blame himself.
"But you were mad at me earlier?" he replied, still being confused. Usually he read you pretty well but now he seemed like he didn't quite understand you.
"No, I wanted to be alone. I felt..." you began.
"Attacked?" Loki said and you nodded with slight smile on your lips. The bond was still there.

"I'm sorry I should have realized." he said then.
"It's okay." you replied innocently, trying to make him feel better.
"So.. you how much did you hear?" Loki changed the subject suddenly. You read him already well enough to understand that he hadn't meant to let you hear his and Thor's conversation.
"Pretty much everything." you said as you walked pass him to your door.
"And..?" he begged you to carry on, but you just shrugged in reply. And Loki just stood there, being stunned and clearly frustrated that you gave him no answer.

Then you turned around before you headed inside after you had already opened your door. "It wasn't all wasted." you said to him, hoping that it would be satisfying answer to him. Loki smiled in relief and nodded. He had accepted it. "Good night little wolf."
"Good night Loki." you replied and then disappeared into your room.

*

Couple weeks passed, team had already forgotten you and Loki, Nat had finally healed and there hadn't been any new attacks. Everything seemed to be finally better.

Or then not.

You dragged yourself into your bathroom late in the morning and splashed some cold water on your face to cool it down.
"Freaking full moon." you growled by yourself. It was that day of the month again and you felt almost as horrible as few times before. But only almost. It felt like your fever wasn't as bad as back then and you were relieved. Maybe this day would be at least tolerable.

After you had dressed up, you headed downstairs to return your book and change it to new one. You knew you wouldn't have enough energy today to do anything else but read, eat and sleep. You were already hungry as hell but you knew you had to switch your book first. Otherwise you wouldn't have enough energy later on the afternoon to do it when your condition would start to get worse.

You walked in and went straight to the bookshelves. You placed your already completed book on the lower shelf and then picked a new one next to it. And then you were just right about to leave, but you stopped as you heard footsteps behind you. And who else could've it been than Loki, who seemed to be there for the same reason as you. But instead of greeting you like usual, he just stared at you, frowning in shock.
"What..?" you asked.
"Your eyes.. they're blue." he said.
"No, no they can't be." you said in shock and ran to the nearest mirror you could find. You hadn't even thought about it when you had been in your bathroom or your room in general. You looked your reflection in the mirror and you had to admit it, Loki had been right. Your eyes were blue! You couldn't believe it. You didn't want to. That bastard had been right after all.

You sat down on the couch while clenching your fists together. You just couldn't believe it. You felt angry and didn't even know why exactly.

Loki was obviously confused and concerned at the same time as he sat down next to you.
"What is it? Is everything okay? Why are they blue and not yellow?" he bombed you with bunch of questions. You sighed heavily in return.
"Do you want to know why I was so sick during those past full moons?" you said while you tried to control your anger and frustration. Loki looked at you, waiting for you to continue.
You took a deep breath and attached your eyes with his.
"It's because that beta in me, started to disappear." you blurted.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"I don't know if I ever told you properly that there can be three different wolves among the pack." you replied. Loki shook his head and waited quietly.
"There is beta, they have yellow eyes like I did and they must obey the alpha of the pack. They are just basically regular wolves with different duties. And then there is alpha of course, red eyes and they lead the pack." you stopped there.
"And what about blue?" he asked, sounding concerned.
"Omega." you sighed. "Means lone wolf, they don't have a pack." you told him.
"But... if I am fully aware of it, you do have a pack." Loki said in confusion. He seemed pretty lost at the time.
"Actually no, I don't. I mean.. beta becomes an omega when they are abandoned or they leave by choice. And when you have been on your own long enough, several full moons without a pack, you will become an omega. You want it or not." you explained.

And while you were talking, you had noticed that Loki was studying you. And he clearly still had bunch of questions to ask. Not everything can be found in those human's ridiculous books.

"You seemed surprised? Should you have expected it when those symptoms started?" he asked then after few minutes of torturing silence.
"I didn't know to be honest. No one in my old pack had ever told us much about omegas, just that they are pathetic and destined to be alone. They didn't care." you replied. "But when I met that werewolf on the mission where Nat got brutally injured, he told me about those symptoms." you added.
"You never told me about that." Loki mumbled, feeling a bit offended.
"I didn't want anyone to know what I was becoming. I even kept hoping that it would just pass and I would stay as beta." you sighed.

Loki looked like he was pitying you and you didn't quite like it. But there was also some sympathy behind his emerald green eyes.
"Why are you so ashamed of it?" he said then as he carefully touched your chin with his finger and turned your eyes towards his.
"I think they look beautiful." he added and you felt your cheeks blushing. Loki blushed too as he smiled softly.

"My little omega..."