Chapter 30

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Tina

I knocked at the door of Taran and Rudhran ji's bedroom. This is not the first time I'm coming into this room in the past three days. There was an unnamed instant connection between Taran and me, and only the previous night I learned the reason.

Taran has brought me to this room to play and study with me. I used to immediately leave as soon as Rudhran ji entered the room but now I have to share the room with him. The door opens and Taran launches at me. I crouched down and hugged him back.

I peeped into the room and couldn't find Rudhran ji in my vision's reach. "Where is daddy?"

"Bathroom la, neenga ulla vaanga, mummy," I didn't feel weird when he called mummy but something fluttered in my belly. I hugged and kissed on his cheeks and he repeated the same.

Is this how every mother feels when their child calls them mother for the first time?

I sit on the bed and him on his computer. Thankfully, I'm facing the opposite side of the closet door, so even if Rudhran ji comes out only he can see me. Though Taran is in his summer holidays, his school is organizing club activities for computer science, maths and science.

Taran showed me his completed science project which I left in half as Rudhran ji returned.

"You finished it?"

"Daddy helped me." It's been over ten minutes when I came but there was no sign of Rudhran ji.

"How long has he been there?"

"More than an hour," he replies and continues with his work.

More than an hour, which means he came here directly after leaving Thooriga's room. He looked like he was broken when he left. I got off the bed and hesitantly walked to the closet. I knocked on the door but it got pushed open and I heard the sound of the shower running.

I entered the closet and stood outside the open bathroom door and called out his name. I didn't get any response, I closed my eyes and slowly stepped into the bathroom to call him again. When I still didn't get any response, I opened my one eye a little but seeing the state he was in, both my eyes shot wide open.

Rudhran ji was sitting under the running shower, fully clothed, balancing his head with his hands leaned against his knees. His body shaking with his muted sobs. I ran to him and shook him as he seemed lost, "Rudhran ji, aap kya kar rahe ho?" (What are you doing?)

I got drenched too and I realized that I didn't turn off the shower. I turned off the shower and I pulled him out of the bathroom with what little strength I had. I tried to make him talk but he didn't reply. I made him sit on a cushion bench in the closet and take a towel to pat his head dry.

Taran watched us and I told him, "Rudhran ji Taran is watching you, please talk something."

I cupped his face through the towel and lifted it up. His eyes were red with all the crying and I didn't understand what to tell him. Suddenly, Rudhran ji, hugs me around my waist and starts crying, burying his face in my belly. I stand frozen, dropping the towel from my hand. Taran chuckles and runs out of the room, closing the door behind him.

"I was never there for her when Jeevitha needed me. She was my best friend and I failed her." I looked down at him and let him pour out his heart. He patiently listened to my story and it's my turn.

"When she was forcibly married to Prakash, when he abused her, when she found out she is pregnant with my child and when she wanted me to check on Taran. If I had stayed here without going on a business trip, I would have saved her from the marriage. If I hadn't put my mobile in silent for a meeting, I wouldn't have lost her and our unborn child."

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