The Catalyst (Can We Change the World?)

confusion and confidence

hi, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. If you do, let me know what you think.

It's be a bit of a rough week so I'm sorry if there a more errors in this than normal.

If you're still enjoying this please consider leaving a comment, I'd love talking to you guys <3

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Shoto buried his face into his pillows, grabbing his blanket and pulling it up around him so that the only thing exposed to the world was his head. He hadn't slept all night and he doubted he would be able to sleep even if he tried.

So he stayed in bed, eyes closed but not sleeping, struggling to control his enhancer. Everything was rushing into his senses too fast and there was far too much information bombarding his brain.

Needless to say, his head was pounding with an awful headache that didn't go away no matter how many painkillers he took. It seemed the quirk triumphed even over modern medicine.

He groaned softly, covered his ears with his hands until even the sound of his blood rushing through his body was too much to handle. It must have been no earlier than seven in the morning but Shoto wasn't going to get up. He wasn't going to go to his classes or see Katsuki or having to deal with all the shit that he was not ready to deal with.

His face was throbbing where Shigaraki punched him and his body was sore from training. While he wanted to focus on the physical pain to avoid the mental distress he was in, for once the physical pain was just as bad.

Damn quirk really got him this time. Shoto was so sure this would never happen again but there he was- completely and utterly overwhelmed.

He'd turned off the burner phone and shoved it deep under the mattress while his normal one was laying on his bedside table, plugged in, but it wasn't going off at all. Shoto wondered if he should be hurt that Katsuki hadn't tried to call him after not showing up this morning.

But then, he could understand if Katsuki was mad after what he pulled the day before. And Shoto hadn't apologized for it, hadn't even spoken to Katsuki.

How could he?

Aside from barely being able to function correctly because of his quirk, Shoto wasn't sure he could stomach talking to his boyfriend.

The only people that are safe are the people that have nothing to do with you.

Shigaraki hadn't been wrong and that was what hurt the most because Shoto couldn't stand it. He couldn't believe how stupid he had being before. He was the danger no matter where he went. That didn't change if he was with the league or Katsuki or his family.

Falling for Katsuki was the reason he was in danger. Letting himself care so much for the blonde was the worst mistake he ever made no, not it was letting himself fall in-

Shoto grit his teeth to stop the thought from forming.

As soon as he admitted it to himself it would be over and there would be no chance he could let go of it all.

So he shoved the thought away and focused on the pain in his cheek and tried desperately to focus on anything other than his thoughts.

He started with the pain but soon found that there was too much of it to focus on and instead tried for the softness of his bed on his skin. If he got the quirk under control then maybe he'd be able to be semi-functional at some point that day.

It seemed impossible but he forced himself to try. Even when he felt like he was sinking in the softness and not in the way of comfortability but rather the only thing he could feel was the soft material, rubbing against him and making him feel as if there was no solid ground.