Somebody To Hold (Book 0.5) (AU series) - INTERSEX

Chapter Forty-Nine

Josephine

Alex left on a business trip a few days ago. Elliot says she takes them often, and sometimes they don't hear back from her for days. I knew she didn't need to take this trip, but of course, she did. Not because she wanted to or because she enjoys her job. It's because she needed to escape the house. To escape me.

It's been two weeks since she has touch me or look at me. In her mind, she is protecting me, but I feel more pain not being acknowledged by her. If I had known telling her about being abstinent for three years and her taking my virginity both times would have caused her to act like this, I would have kept it to myself.

I miss her faint touches. It was so short-lived. I crave her the way Elliot has been craving me. She's two months pregnant now, and since Alex isn't here, I'm all she can have. She's been taking full advantage. Not in a bad way. Just when she gets very aroused, I'm at her beck and call, and trust me, I answer that call. No questions asked.

I think Adelaide has picked up on what I mean to them... or at least Elliot. There's not much hiding it. Elli is a koala attached to my hip. She is overly clingy, and she doesn't give a fuck who sees. Including the children. I mean, she's not sexual in front of them, thank the lord, but she does tend to hold my hand, sit on my lap, whine about being held, and of course, cuddles up to me constantly. Since Alexandria has been gone for a few days now, the innocent touching has increased.

It's extended past just in the house. Like right now, we are out having a picnic on the beach while the kids are at school. I know we should be working, but both of us have been gloomy since Papito left.

"Dog. What about you?" I ask. We are playing 21 questions. She thought it would be fun and I've learned a lot about her. She wanted to learn more about me because she felt like she didn't know much... other than the horrible things. News flash... that is all there is to me, a dark stormy past. She refuses to believe that's it. So, she roped me into the game.

"Dogs... I mean, I love all animals. Except for spiders. You can miss me with that shit. I don't care if they are the size of a freaking rice grain, I will scream bloody murder! I had a dog named Toto when I first met Alex... he didn't live very long after that. I mean, he was already very old around the time they came into my life."

I admire her beauty as she continues to ramble on and on. I could listen to her soothing voice all day long. "I'm sorry I'm rambling. What about you? Have you ever had any animals?"

"It's okay. Yeah actually, I had a pet hamster once named cookie."

"Cookie?" she chuckles.

"Yeah, she was black and white. It reminded me of an Oreo cookie. She lasted pretty long. Three years, and then one day I found her, and she was hard as a rock. I buried her in the backyard. Put on a whole funeral for her by myself. I even wrote some silly poem for her." I smile at the memory.

"Okay, let's hear it," she demands, placing a cracker in her mouth and wiping her hands together.

"No. It's embarrassing!"

"Mhmm come on!" I sigh, trying to remember how it went.

"Okay... let's see if I can remember it...

Here rests my lovely hamster Cookie. Though seeing you lie there dead... shook me. I will not let your death be in vain. Maybe one day again I'll see you in Spain. You got out of your cage almost every night, and each time you gave me quite the freight. Now you lie beneath the dirt and rest so peaceful. It's better than sitting in your kennel smelling mighty lethal."

I finish recollecting the poem and look her way as her lips are pursed, trying not to laugh at me.

"Oh my God!"