The Neverending Hangover

Chapter Thirty-Six

Bre stayed home from work with me. I insisted I would be fine alone but Steve gently told me it wasn't for me. She had been shook up, and of course she was pregnant, after all.

So we stayed home together. I didn't mind. I was really sore and I laid around quite a bit with Maggie to snuggle. I took two naps and made calls.

I called Tommy, filled him in, insisted I was still doing the shows on Friday and Saturday, then got a call back from Rafe because Tommy tattled. I fiercely argued with Rafe for so long that he finally resigned himself to if my doctor sent him a note clearing me to perform by Thursday, he would allow it. He also promised to get PR involved to make sure my name wasn't involved in the kidnapping and rollover.

I called Tommy back and let him know what Rafe said. He wasn't pleased.

"You're pushing yourself too far", he insisted. "Plus, don't you need to be there for Brad?"

"Me leaving for two days isn't going to affect anything", I said. "I have no idea when they're even going to let him out. Have Rafe not book any more gigs till the following weekend then, if you're so worried. Then I'll have all next week to rest".  They needed money and I wasn't going to mess that up because of my Jay drama.

Bre was also concerned. "I don't like it, either", she said. "Should you even be flying?"

"I guess I'll find out", I said, and called the hospital to find out how I could arrange an appointment with the doctor who evaluated me.  I got an appointment for Thursday morning.

Then I called the mental health clinic where I had done inpatient therapy. I hadn't met with my therapist for several months.  She called me back by the afternoon and I used Steve's laptop to do a video call with her.

It was difficult. I told her about Rev, Brad, and Jay, which all took so long that we didn't have any time for working through it. She set up a video call with me for next week, but she did have one takeaway for me.  I was a very physical person, so I expressed love in physical ways, and I also craved comfort in physical ways.  When I was around men specifically, it set me up for situations like Rev.  I needed to be aware of my tendencies, my emotional state, and be intentional about the situations I was putting myself into.

Thank God Steve recognized that last night or I'd probably be dealing with a whole lot of regret today.

Andy called and said Scott had been to see Brad, that he was doing okay, and that the judge needed the official autopsy report before he could decide on bail. Andy also assured me I could see him anytime during visitor hours, and let me know when those were. He said that Rev had put a ton of pressure on the local police and the FBI both for them to complete their reports, so the judge already had those. 

That warmed my heart immensely. Brad was the competition, yet because it was what I wanted, Rev pushed for his release.

What an incredible man.

I called Rev next. He answered immediately.

"I'll call you later", he simply said, and hung back up on me. I sighed, then went downstairs to fill Bre in on everything.

Since Steve had told us both very harshly that morning that we were not to leave the house, we decided we had better wait to go see Brad until he got home from work. Steve was rattled from yesterday's events also, but he was short staffed this week and really needed to be at work. 

Bre looked completely worn out, and more emotional than I had ever seen her. The pregnancy hormones were a huge factor, of course, but she also told me that she'd never had a brush with anything even close to that before. Sometime before noon she had been sobbing and said she didn't know how I functioned as well as I did having been through situations like that so many times, and that she hadn't given me enough grace for my actions in the past.