sarah paulson character - one shots

i want to help you(Ellie Staple)

Info: You are going to a new therapist to treat your mental conditions.

Trigger warning: Depression, anxiety, self-harm!

Italics(𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘦𝘸) are your thoughts!

I drove along the quiet road in my car. The sun was hidden by many white clouds so it was pretty cold. I turned the dial up on the heater with my other hand on the steering wheel. Not long later, I arrived at the large brick building. 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘨𝘰 𝘪𝘯. I pulled the vanity mirror down and fiddled with my hair until it was to my liking. 𝘊𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘯 (𝘺/𝘯), 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘰𝘬. 𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨. I pushed the mirror back to it's place and got out the car, not forgetting my phone and keys. I slipped my phone in the back pocket of my blue jeans as I approached the mysterious building. I quickly hopped up the concrete stairs until I was face to face with the main door. Pulling the heavy door open, the building was just as cold as outside. 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢 𝘫𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘵. I shivered and crossed my arms as goose bumps appeared on my arms. Then I continued down the long hallway.

Eventually, I reached a door labelled 'Waiting room' and opened it cautiously. I was greeted by an empty room with rows of chairs. I walked in and looked around, hoping there was some staff around. "Hello?" My voice echoed through the lifeless building which gave me chills. I jumped as a woman answered back. I turned and saw a beautiful woman standing in the doorway of what looked like an office. "Hi there, you must be (y/n)." She smiled in a friendly way but I didn't trust her. I don't know what it was but something seemed off. "Uh- yeah that's me." I smiled and bit my nail, with my other hand resting on my forearm. "I'm Doctor Ellie Staple, I'll be your new therapist. Please, come in." She walked into the room and sat at a chair that was facing a sofa. I walked into the room and took a seat on the couch, in front of Ellie.

"So, your previous therapist, Doctor Morrison, sent me your file last week. Depression, anxiety and self-harm, right?" I nervously nodded my head while shuffling in my seat. "You seem nervous (y/n), would you mind telling me why?" I shrugged and looked at my hands that sat on my lap as her gaze was strong and she was not breaking eye contact. "I think it's because I just met you. I need time to get to know you until I can trust you." She nodded her head slowly in my peripheral vision and looked back down at my file. "Well I don't know how much this means to you," She placed her hand on my thigh causing me to blush and look back in her eyes. "You can trust me, (y/n). 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙥 𝙮𝙤𝙪." She smiled but this time I trusted her. I smiled in return and nodded as she removed her hand. I missed the feeling of her hand on my lap but tried to ignore it.

"Can we talk about your depression (y/n)?" I exhaled and nodded while replying. "Sure. What do you want to know?" Ellie sucked her bottom lip and looked behind me while she thought. "Tell me how your feeling right now." I picked my nails as I tried to understand how I was feeling at this moment. "Tired. Numb. Bored. I always feel like this now, Dr Staple. I have for a while now." I averted my gaze from her eyes to my lap as I felt like breaking down but couldn't due to my lack of emotion. "I'm sorry you feel like that (y/n)," She placed her hand back on my thigh and I felt my heart skip a beat. 𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴? "But we are going to try and help you as much as possible." She smiled but looked worried. I smiled weakly at her before looking back down at my lap, looking at her hand that sat gently on my thigh.

She moved her hand away after a few moments and cleared her throat. "Anyways, what about your self-harming issue?" I tensed at the this question. "What about it?" She answered me back quickly. "When was the last time you hurt yourself (y/n)." My breath hitched and I closed my eyes to avoid accidently catching her gaze. "I um- I relapsed last night. I'm sorry." I opened my eyes and saw her looking at me, pouting in a sympathetic, genuine way. "Don't be sorry sweetie, I know it's hard but we will overcome this. Together." I smiled as a single tear rolled down my pink cheek. Ellie reached over and brushed it away with her thumb, before looking into my eyes. I flickered my eye lids as I felt safety in her aura. She made me feel safe. I trusted her.

a/n - ok so this is terrible and i hate it honestly. i'm sorry abt how bad it is and i promise the next one will be worth reading haha. have a good day/night, i love you always <33