Against the Odds A Love Story

Chapter 18

The worth of happiness isn't truly appreciated until it disappears, then reappears.

Eighteen

Standing in the living room of Hayden's home, I breathed in deeply the fresh scent of wood, pine, and leather. His scent, which normally mingled with the others, was absent. I missed his scent. I craved it.

I slowly walked down the hallway past a guest room and paused at the door of Hayden's bedroom before entering. Heaving an emotional sigh, I let my gaze travel around the room. This room was definitely Hayden. There were signs of him everywhere. From the faded brown western hat on the tall wooden bedpost, to the framed print of  a cowboy on a bucking bronco, to the western decorative throw draped across the bottom of the beige down comforter set on the high king-size bed. He was everywhere.

I walked over to the dresser and picked up the bottle of Stetson cologne. He always wore it when we were together in the evenings. I smiled as I remembered him telling me that when he wasn't with me, there was no point in wearing it. It made me feel so special. I opened the bottle and lightly inhaled the scent, unprepared for the rush of emotion it brought. I quickly closed it and placed it back on the dresser. Then I remembered my main reason for coming in his room in the first place.

I walked over to the bed and picked up his pillow. Hugging it against me, I pressed my face into it and breathed in the scent that was his. It seeped into my senses and made me crave his gentle touch and loving caresses even more. I looked around the room a final time before taking the pillow and returning to the living room.

I knew that I should head back to David and Caroline's, but I couldn't bring myself to leave. Instead, I placed the pillow on the leather couch, took off my boots, and curled up, placing the pillow snugly beneath my head. I was so tired. Not just physically tired, but emotionally exhausted as well. I was tired of missing Hayden, tired of being alone, and tired of trying not to lose hope in the face of the uncertainty I felt each day.

“I'm so tired, Hayden,” I whispered into the pillow. “I'm so tired.”

~ ~ ~

Slowly waking from a deep sleep, I unconsciously leaned into the warmth I felt against my face, relishing the comfort it gave. Sighing, I slowly opened my eyes.

“Hayden,” I breathed. Except for the moonlight shining through the curtains it was dark, but I would know his outline anywhere. He knelt before me, and I was immediately overwhelmed by his presence. Suddenly remembering where I was, I sat up and brushed the hair back from my face. “I'm sorry . . .” I cleared my throat, trying to get rid of the raspy tone in my voice. “I know I shouldn't be here. I'll go.” When I tried to get up, he placed a gentle hand on my arm to stop me. At his touch, I heard the beat of my heart hammering in my ears.

“Don't leave.” His voice quivered with emotion. “Please, baby, don't ever leave me.”

I swallowed hard against the tears of joy in my throat, but I couldn't stop the sob that escaped. I couldn't believe he was there, that he wanted me to stay. It was too good to be true.

I pressed my hand to his cheek and caressed it as his tears wet my palm. Feeling his hands move to my waist, I took his face between my hands and our mouths instantly fused together. He pressed me tightly to him. His kisses were hot and fevered, and the sensation sent my mind and heart into emotional overload. We drank of each other, desperately trying to quench our thirst but unable to. The same words tumbled through my head over and over.

I love you. I love you. I love you. Please don't ever leave me again. Please don't. I need you, I need you . . .

He heaved a raspy sigh as his moist kisses traveled down my neck, just above the opening of my shirt and I suddenly felt as if I was on fire. He could have asked me for anything at the moment and I would have freely given it. I wouldn't have been strong enough to resist.