Oh My Captain

Ball 15

Good thing we were both occupied with our busy trainings. The air between us after that incident became awkward and uncomfortable. I can't even look at him in the eyes anymore. I am avoiding him to the core. Hindi ko na siya magawang tignan sa mga mata gaya dati. Hindi ko na rin siyang kayang tabihan pa. So, I chose, what I ought the best to lessen the dilema.

Tiff asked what had happened at us when she noticed our awkwardness in the van, going home the next day. I just told her it was nothing but she seems did not belief my response. Di rin niya ako kinulit pero nararamdaman ko ang pakikiramdam niya sa pagitan namin ng kambal niya.

For a week, we haven't seen nor talk to each other. What I said that day was hard to retrieve. But, do I regret it? I say, No. It was stagnant inside of my heart for a long time. I have done with his mixed signals and I am done behaving like those things never affected me.

Even it lighten the load in my heart, I still felt guilty and embarrass at the same time about it. Nahihiya ako sa kaniya dahil nalaman na niya na sa mahabang panahon may pagtingin ako sa kaniya. I take it all in me that I was like a bystander when he and Mackenzie are having their rough time. I deserve better and I don't want him to realize that. It was on me. It was I, who must realize it.

"Alright team!" coach Mave started. "I am proud of all your hardworks. I know, I was tough this week to all of you because I have set a goal in mind that we will win this league this time against the champion that is why I am pushing to your limit" his long sentence of wisdom.

Mataman akong nakikinig sa lahat ng sinasabi niya habang hingal na hingal at nagpupunas ng pawis sa batok at mukha. Hindi biro ang training namin ngayon dahil nga next week na yung league. We understand his strick and tough trainings. In volleyball, agility is enough to sustain and win the fight. Endurance is also played an important part. Itong pagod na to, will be worth for sure in the game. I know it, my team know it, and coach Mave knows it.

The training ended with a beautiful words of encouragement from our coach. As reward a he said, he invited us to a team dinner. Wait there is more. A team dinner treat by him but with his wife and her team as well.

What a great dinner diba? Yung tipong gutom na gutom ka pero hindi mo magawang makakain ng maayos. And that was really happened in the table. Bakit ba kasi sa lahat ng matatapat ko, siya pa. O dear lord, why are you forsaken me?

It is really awkward. Should I talk? then what words I shall say to him? should I joke? but I don't know how to be funny. Should I ask his training? but I don't want him to think that I am curious, even though I am really curious about his activies this week. Ugh! bakit ba kasi napunta ako dito.

"Bakit ang tahimik ngayon ng dalawang captain namin ah" coach Lindsay said.

I bit my lower lip in tension. All eyes are on us right now. I awkwardly glance at them. Kulang nalang bigyan nila kami ng spotlight ngayon sa mga titig nila. I bit my lower even more and averted my gaze back to my slightly untouched food on my plate.

"Did something happened?" She asked again.

I held my hand tightly and move my head towards them. I forced a fake a smile at them.

"Wala po, pagod lang siguro" I said with an awkward chuckles.

"Pansin ko nga din yun nung pauwi tayo galing Quezon" si Amanda.

O great, here we are, the great paparazzi Amanda.I saw Tiff elbowed her. Kala niya nakatulong ang pagsiko niya sa katabi. She made it worst. Now, they are eyeing us in more curious way. Oh great! Oh fucking great.

I gulped and move my vission to the man in front of me. I send him a helping look. Mukha siyang pakialam which annoys me. Nanadya ba siya? He should help me right now but the jerk just crossed his arms over his chest and even leaned his back proudly on the backrest of the chair. I groan silently inside. Kainis.