For Your Eyes Only [h.s.]

Ch. 28 - "Maybe we'll work it out"

Three Months Later, June 2021
Adelaide Young

So when I agreed to come on tour with Harry, I didn't really expect this kind of tour. I imagined late night motion sickness from the bus swaying, junk food from random rest stops, and running out of clean laundry and struggling to find a place to run a load.

Harry's version of a tour is more so the private planes, fancy hotels, laundry send-out service kind of tour. We're about to kick off the first show tonight and everyone who is anyone in the industry is showing up for it. 

Somehow over the past few months people haven't questioned me too much in the press. 

I've been grateful for the relative anonymity, worried about the quiet status quo with Noah changing. We're still waiting for word back from the court, until then the restraining order keeping me safe.

Some of the more enthusiastic fans found me in tagged group photos and followed me on social media, I assume to get every opportunity at looks at the concerts, hoping I'll post from different shows. It's definitely not about following me because they know that I am absolutely falling for their favorite rockstar. 

Fans mostly assume I'm just another friend/staff member who joined the team recently. It's fortunate that Harry has so many friends who work on the team and since I've made it clear that for as long as I am an employee in a sense, there can be nothing more.

So there is nothing. 

No privacy to talk, no shared rooms or beds, I don't even sit next to him at team meetings. 

No late night chats, no secret glances, no special reserved seats. I eat with the team, sleep by the team, and see the concert from the very same section in the back with the rest of the team. I'm ok with that, that is what I asked for. 

And yet, just because I said I don't want to be anything more than coworkers and friends, doesn't mean I don't still dream about being able to hold him and be held by him. 

I need this time to focus on myself anyway. The nightmares haven't gone away by any means, but they've slowed and so it's only once or twice a month where I wish I could go back to those nights where Harry would offer to stay with me and help me through them.

Harry, however, has made it abundantly clear that he is not as into this arrangement which is how we got where we are right now. Me, sitting here in my makeshift office going through some of the special poster edits we're making for a few of the special shows on tour and Harry refusing to meet with me for approvals. It's been two hours since I asked for him to stop by for a meeting. He responded with a sexual innuendo about it not being smart, us alone in an office and the things he fantasized about as a young man in that situation. 

I've called, texted, walkie-talkied... basically everything besides sending an SOS signal to get this boy to come meet with me, but no. Harry is giving me the silent treatment because I told him that he got a bit too cozy the other night. 

We were on a press event for the most recent single when we decided to celebrate the sold out tour. One drink led to a few drinks for us both, and by the end of the night Harry was whining that he couldn't "make it all the way" to his room. I, even in my own drunken stupor, am not stupid enough to fall for that line when his eyes looked like literal sex. 

So when he walked me to my door to make sure I made it back safely, I texted Jeff to come collect Harry. He looked like a small child, the pout on his face when Jeff arrived. 

So now as I'm finishing up some minor edits in my Adobe Creative Suite - all of which could have been done an hour ago if Harry weren't being a petulant child; I've managed to mess up an angle edit as my phone just chimed out, loud.