His sunflower

chapter 26

Abby's pov

"...hey Abby"

What the fuck? Why the hell is Josh standing on my doorstep. Better yet why'd he ruin my moment with Johnny.

Me and Johnny have gotten really close and  2 weeks ago I would've told you I only thought of him as a best friend. Well when we weren't in public but honestly I think it's more than that now. He's really sweet and he cares. He acts like we're actually dating even when we aren't in public. He makes boring things fun. He makes me laugh when i'm sad. He's just amazing.

"What are you doing here, Josh?"

"We need to talk"

'you gotta be fucking kidding me' I hear Johnny scoff under his breath. What's wrong with him?

"That sucks doesn't it" I say faking a pouting face "because I don't want to talk to you" I go to close the door but he puts his foot in the door.

"Abby... please. I swear I've changed. And I know your with Johnny but come on you know I can treat you better than him. I swear I'll treat you like you've never been treated. Those times I tried to force it on you I just wasn't in my right mind. Abby please. I miss you so much and I've punched myself in the face everyday since you left me." He finishes by looking down at the porch.

What the fuck just happened? I can't trust him though. No way i'm putting myself in a vulnerable position for this boy ever again. Besides I'm not leaving Johnny even if it's fake.

"Sorry Josh but like you said I'm with Johnny and I hate to hurt your already giant ego but we all know you couldn't treat me better than Johnny does. You don't have an ounce of respect for women. Now if you'll kindly step off my porch and leave me the fuck alone I would appreciate it." And then I closed the door not even waiting for a response. I look over at Johnny and he's pacing. "Johnny?" He looks up at me. "What's wrong?" I go to walk up to him but he steps back. "Johnny?"

"Abby I can't handle this." what?

"What do you mean?"

"How can you not see it! Josh and Sam both want you! How can I compete with that! They are the two most popular people in the school and you think I expect you to choose me over them? Abby don't kid yourself. They both want you and one of them is gonna win and steal you from me." I was speechless I didn't know what to say. How do you respond to that. When I didn't say anything he scoffed and said "I gotta go" under his breath and walked past me through the door. What the actual fuck?

After the door closed behind him I went to my bedroom and started pacing. What just happened? Josh comes and practically begs for a second chance and then Johnny freaks out on me? How is this my fault? I wasn't gonna leave him for anyone but he obviously didn't see it that way. In the middle of my pacing the oven went off and I remembered that I was making brownies. I went to take them out and they smelled soo good. I put them on the counter to cool and then went into my room again to change. I need to go on a run.

When I was ready I checked to make sure the oven was off and everything was okay to be left alone. I pulled my shoes on and then went out of the door. I started with a quick walk to warm up my muscles and then stopped at the park to stretch. After I finished stretching I started running. My run was supposed to get me to stop thinking about boys, but instead that's all my thoughts consisted of. I couldn't figure out what Josh wanted or why Johnny was so pissed. And then on top of that my best friends were still mad at me. I need to talk to them. They need more time though. I need them to cool off before I attempt anything.

***

After I finished running I went home and to say I was stressing myself out was an understatement. Everyone is mad at me. And for what? I kept something from my best friends yes I know, but I had my reasons! And Johnny, don't even get me started on Johnny. Josh shows up and he gets pissed at me? Johnny should be mad at Josh not me. I didn't invite Josh over. I was hanging out with Johnny. For some reason my dad doesn't care about me and never has. And the only two people who don't hate me right now aren't home. So i'm here alone sitting on my bed trying to figure out what I did.

After 5 minutes of wallowing in self pity I decided enough was enough. I'm talking to Sierra and Maddy tomorrow and if they don't understand they don't love me as much as they said they did. I'm gonna ignore Johnny because i'm done stressing over these boys. They act like they are on there period. Boys are worse then girls and girls get bashed for it. It's all just fucked up. And for my dad he could die and id laugh at his funeral. I do not care anymore. I'm done depending on people. That's all I ever do. If they don't want me I won't fight for them.

That's what I told myself anyway. My mentality makes me seem confident and sure of myself but i'm 99.99% positive I won't give up on Sierra or Maddy. The boy part i'm 100% serious about because who needs men. Not me.

After that little mental talk with myself I hopped in the shower so I could have a little longer to sleep in the morning. After my shower I brushed my teeth and laid in my bed watching tv. As I was drifting off to sleep I heard the front door open and my family's voices followed. I was too tired to to greet them so I stayed in bed. I'd see them in the morning.

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Hey shawties I'm giving you the chapter 2 days early. If you haven't seen I posted an announcement on my profile about a posting schedule. Thank you for reading<3