Summer Love - James Worpel

Chapter 57

The bell finally rings for the end of the day and I make my way to my car quickly, as I need to be at the Whitten Oval by 4pm. 

For some reason they've decided to start their training later today, maybe just to trial something different as who really loves getting up early in the morning? Let's be real. 

This morning I didn't really get to have any time with James, as he was still sleeping when I needed to leave for work. It was a pretty emotionally exhausting night. 

So I let him sleep, we can talk about what happened last night, tonight, when I get home. 

I did place a kiss on his cheek though before I left, because I would've felt bad just leaving, without saying some sort of goodbye but maybe we need this space just to think, and to breathe a bit. 

We didn't really talk it out after we made up last night, we just sat there and cuddled, telling each other over and over again that we love each other. 

I guess sometimes it's better if we take some time to think about what happened, so that we don't blow up in each other's faces when we talk about it again.

I guess part of it was my fault. Why did I have to fuck it up? I feel so guilty about what I did. It's made me realise that maybe I need to back off a bit from Aaron. Yes, he is my best friend, but James is right, do I really need to be that close to him when he's showing me something on his phone? 

Thinking about it now, it makes total sense why James would be mad, because I would be too if the roles were reversed. I know Aaron likes me, I'm not blindsided to it, but I'm not any better for feeding into it and being all touchy and close to him. 

It's like I'm giving him false hope, and that's the least thing I want to do. The truth is, I'm happy with James, and what happened last night was really a wake up for me to not do anything stupid, because I know within a heartbeat James will leave. He doesn't deserve this bullshit. 

And I am going to try everything I can to prove to him that this won't happen again. And I know it definitely won't happen again because I hated how we were speaking to each other last night, I hated it. It made me upset that I was being so stupid, like what was I thinking? That's the thing, I wasn't. So James has every right to be upset with me. 

I sigh to myself as I replay the argument over and over in my head as I pull into an empty carpark spot and park the car. 

I've been trying to be my happy, joyful self, but I just can't. I keep thinking about how stupid I am. 

I sigh again to myself as I plant a smile on my face, getting out of the car and walking into the building. 

Of course, I can't walk in by myself for once as Baz is at my side. 

"You've had a big day today." He says and I nod. 

"Well yeah, usually training is on Tuesday." I shrug and he nods as we walk through the entrance and to the cafe where we take a seat as we're both here pretty early. 

"Are you okay?" He asks and I nod. 

"Fine why?" 

"No you just seem a bit down... did you have a shitty day?" 

"The kids were being a bit of a pain in the ass, but it's nothing but the usual." I say and he nods.

"Alright, but if you need to talk about anything... you can.." He says and I nod, thanking him. 

I look over at the entrance and sigh a massive sigh of relief when I see Em and Marcus walk in. 

I get up, saying goodbye to Baz and following Em into our office where I shut the door straight away and she looks at me.