Summer Love - James Worpel

Chapter 66

Three months later...

It's been three months since the terrible events of me getting stabbed at school.

If I'm being honest, these past three months haven't been easy for me with the constant anxiety and flashbacks of the events that took place. But having James by my side has helped me overcome it.

I still get a bit anxious when I see the massive scar I have, but I just remind myself that it's apart of me now, and soon it'll be fully healed.

Even though it's very minimal, as majority of the scar has healed, I still hate it. Hate what it's done to me.

Having to cover up the scar for a couple months meant that I lost full confidence in myself.

Every time I would look at myself, I would see someone else. I couldn't stop thinking about how much that event had changed my life, and how I no longer liked what I saw.

I had to learn how to love myself again, and it took its time. I just couldn't understand why all these things happened to me, and why was it always me.

There were times where I would be changing clothes, and I would stand in front of the mirror, looking at myself, looking at the scar, and finding every fault I could with my body.

And then the self destruction begun.

Why is my left side curvier than the right?

Why do my cheeks look like that?

Why can't my eyebrows be even?

Why is one eye smaller than the other?

Why do I have hip dips?

Over and over again, I would repeat these same phrases in my head to the point where I would break down. At one stage I thought I had no purpose, I thought I was worthless, and didn't know why James was still with me because of how broken I was.

But, James being James, picked up every single piece and stuck it back together.

From not being able to get out of bed to walk downstairs, to going out for a walk around the block with him.

James helped me become the person I am today, and I am extremely grateful for it. Ever since what happened, I've been spending more time with the people I love, because you just never know what can happen.

The school lockdown made me realise that there's no point in dwelling on the past, but instead enjoy the present, and enjoy the company of the people you love most.

Although I haven't been able to go back to school, since it's school holidays, I have been doing fun things with James to keep us both occupied especially since it's the off season.

Footy season ended with a bang, let's just say. Dogs just missed the 8, and Hawks were looking very scary towards the end of the season but also failed to make the 8.

Baz came back stronger than ever from his weeks off from the video that circulated of him taking drugs. Definitely wasn't ideal, considering we really could've used him in those weeks, but the main thing is, is that he learnt from it, and showed everyone that he wouldn't let a stupid mistake affect his career.

I was there to support him every step of the way. He even moved in with James and I because of the whole thing, he just couldn't be alone in his house, which is fair enough.

Three months later and he's finally moved out, but that doesn't mean he doesn't spend every second day at James and I's house. I feel like he got comfortable living with us so he didn't want to leave. But, he has a gorgeous house that he recently bought this year so I begged him to go back and live there.